A Sad Eagles Fan’s Super Bowl Preview

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Another year, another disappointing finish. Ah, the life of a Philadelphia Eagles fan. Eagles fans of Penn State, please sympathize with me.

This particular season, however, was just plain embarrassing. Any fan of the NFL or casual viewer of ESPN heard our (now former) strip-club loving, manic depressive, backup quarterback proclaim this year’s version of the Eagles the “dream team”. Well, that one certainly blew up in our faces.

All the usual Andy Reid shenanigans took place this year: shitty clock management, complete lack of any in-game adjustments, thinking that some undersized late round draft pick can start on defense, not giving your extremely talented running back the goddamn football, failing on 3rd and 1 continuously, horrendous red zone defense, and me throwing various blunt objects or my fist into or through a wall.

Eagles fans are extremely sick of the same shortcomings over and over. We’ve still never won a single Super Bowl. At this point, if you are optimistic about an Eagles season, you need a swift kick in the balls.

Just around the corner is Super Bowl Sunday, and now I get to watch this guy and this guy try to win another Super Bowl. I hate the Giants. I hate the Patriots (except for Coach Billy!). One of our most heated rivals is facing the team that I indirectly blame for my cynicism after the 2005 Super Bowl. This sucks. I don’t need to see Tom Brady and his perfect, silky, flowing hair hoist another Lombardi trophy. It would be even worse to see that jackass Tom Coughlin and Eli Manning’s stupid face standing up on the illustrious stage of victory.

I’ll be sure to drown my sorrows in a 12-pack and by eating half my body weight in hors d’oeuvres. Ah, the life of an Eagles fan.

At least now there are rumors that Donovan McNabb would come back to Philly as a backup quarterback next year! Maybe after Mike Vick gets hurt again he can promptly lead us to another NFC Championship game loss! Plus, defensive coordinator extraordinaire Juan Castillo will be back! Next year will definitely be our year!

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About Author

Sam is a senior originally from Newtown, PA who majors in print journalism and is a member of the John Curley Center for Sports Journalism. His athletic peak was age 11 so he decided to grow a beard and write about sports instead.

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  1. and watching highlights of Brian Westbrook and Desean Jackson running back punts on your team amuses me highly.

  2. Eagles did pretty well by the end of the season this year and as an Eagles fan and a Philly native I am still very proud of my team! Unlike many other team’s fan’s, in which they are only fans because their team wins. Eagles fans are fans because we are passionate and loving and supporting of our team through the bad and good times. Being from Philly, it’s like a marriage right? Through the sick and and the good. I have hopes for this team and one day Philadelphia sports teams will come through. Who says that Philies was never going to win world series? Who says the Flyers would have never been in the Stanely Cups? Who says that 76sers sucks?? Eagles are next!! Again, I am overall proud of the team’s performance this season despit Andy Reid’s mistakes they had a big turn around by the last couple games of the season. Keep faith with support and love for your team! One of these days it’s all going to be worth it. E.A.G.L.E.! Go birds!!!! <<Philadelphia forever>>

  3. It is not weather a team wins or loses. It is rather the fact that they did their best and come through no matter the critics and the pressures. It is the heart of the game, the heart of the matter and not the money or the fame or even winning.

  4. Eli’s face is really stupid. That is pretty much the best description of it… just something about it. But I’ll tell you what, that stinkin’ Mouth Breather can close

  5. <i>this is a comments page isn’t it? Or did I get it wrong?</i>

    Depends if you’re tap-able or not.

  6. The city of Philadelphia has NOTHING to complain and sulk over in the sports world. Hop off that soap box.