The 10 Types of Penn State Dads You’ll See This Weekend
Penn State Dads are one of the best breeds of human on the planet, as any Penn Stater worth their hatred of Pitt can attest to. Filled with Penn State spirit and dripping with Dad Swag, Penn State Dads are the spirit animals of most undergrads. Lucky for us, Blue-White Weekend is perhaps only second to Homecoming in Penn State Dad population in State College!
So, Onward State has a challenge for the tailgating masses this weekend: Take a selfie with a Penn State Dad and e-mail them to us at firstname.lastname@example.org with your name for a Monday post (Penn State Moms obviously rule, too, but Dad selfies are more hilarious).
Since all Penn State Dads are not created equal, here are the 10 types to look out for this weekend:
When HE went here, Beaver Stadium didn’t have an upper deck! He even had to READ BOOKS in the library! He will probably tell you how there were no selfies when HE went here when you try to take one with him.
Sure, he doesn’t sit in the student section anymore, but that doesn’t mean he won’t dress to the nines in Penn State apparel. Look out for one of those blue and white wigs.
He can and will outdrink you, so don’t embarrass yourself and try to keep up. Huge bonus points for a selfie mid-shotgunning.
Still the man in his own way, the hardass dad will make sure the tailgate doesn’t get out of hand. He might even save you from getting an underage.
Family man Dad
Most Penn State Dads are family men, of course, but this one is part of a clan of Penn State Grandmas and Grandpas and Moms and Dogs and Kids. If his whole family isn’t at the tailgate, he isn’t happy.
He should come equipped with a cell phone holder on his belt and have to dip from the tailgate or bar to make some phone calls, but he still knows he’s here to have a good time. If he can find time to take a picture with you, consider yourself lucky.
I mean, yeah, he’s still a Penn State Dad. Think Galen Hall.
You might think he’s your average alumnus, until you see the baby nearby. This breed of Penn State Dad is perhaps the most like us young folk.
Burgers and dogs take absolute priority for this type of dad, and he is also almost certain to have either a Penn State chef’s hat or apron on. He is crucial to any real tailgate.
Wannabe Coach Dad
At the tailgate, he’ll let you know what needs fixing about Christian Hackenberg’s mechanics. In Beaver Stadium, James Franklin had better listen up, because this dad will be pontificating from the stands about his personnel.
What kinds of Penn State Dad did I miss? Comment about it!