This weekend while others day drank and enjoyed the lush weather, I took a spontaneous visit to the Centre County PAWS adoption center. Missing a furry feline friend in my lonely college life, it was about time.

September marks the adoption month of “Septempurr,” as Centre County PAWS endearingly calls it. This darling establishment has open walk-ins to visit cats and see the adorable potential pets. As I wandered around, in sheer kitten paradise, I couldn’t help but notice these cats had FANTASTIC NAMES.

Though every cat was arguably adorable and a winner, there was some clear champions. Here is the creme de la creme of the Centre County PAWS cats.

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Duke of Windsor

Duke of Windsor wound up in the shelter because the “owner was no longer able to care for him.” Hey, we all can’t have a job and take care of royalty!

Mushu

If Mushu wasn’t a cute enough name on its own, this lady birthed five kittens…named after Chinese food.

Chinese Food Kittens

Enter said Chinese Food Kittens! Sesame, Teriyaki, Wonton, General Tso, and Szechuan are sure to spice up a household.

Doot Doot

The line “root root for Doot Doot” was all it took — I was sold. These kitten care-takers need to pursue a copy-writing gig because I am impressed. Doot Doot is also the funnest thing to repeatedly say, so this domestic short hair has my heart.

Edgar Allan Purr

Like the 1800s brooding mystery writer himself, this cat is nothing but pure poetry.

Fisherman Gordon

Not to be confused with the Gorton’s Fish Sticks. This cat has reeled in my attention.

Madam Smackers

For such a bold and sassy name, Madam Smackers’ bio remains rather open-ended. The mystery is killing me.

Miss Chiquita

There is no doubt this feline is as sweet as a banana.

Not Fluffy

The anonymity of this entry is very enticing. How NOT fluffy is Not Fluffy? Is she in fact a hairless cat? Simply too unique for a mainstream name like “Fluffy,” her owner simply had to make a stand? Thus naming her “Not Fluffy”?! These are the answers we need.

Squishy Pickle

This domestic shorthair also responds to “Squishy” or “Squish.’

Sweet Corn

Named after a sweet produce and sporting a tuxedo coat, this cat is no doubt a charmer.

Cocktail Kittens

Though ‘Gimlet’ made the coveted pictorial for this shot, you can also get tipsy with Martini, Daiquiri & Fizz, and Mai Tai!

Arnold Scwarzenegger

Hasta La Vista, Baby!