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Staff Picks: Cardboard Cutouts We Want To See At Beaver Stadium

Now that Penn State Athletics has officially confirmed fans won’t be attending sporting events this fall, it’s certain Beaver Stadium won’t be #107kStrong anytime soon.

Without Nittany Lions fans packing the bleachers, it’s clear Penn State should take a page out of Major League Baseball’s book and pack the stadium with cardboard cutouts of fans, notable figures, and everyone in between.

To help the team plan ahead, our staffers got the ball rolling and discussed the Penn State-centric cardboard cutouts they’d like to see line the stadium this fall.

Colleen Nersten: Big Uglies

I would like to see the Big Uglies remain in Beaver Stadium in the form of cardboard cutouts. They’re so dedicated that even a pandemic wouldn’t stop them. To Penn State students, the Big Uglies are arguably as important on gameday than the Nittany Lion himself.

As long as the players have their superfans in attendance, winning games will be a breeze. The Big Uglies are so iconic that it wouldn’t be gameday without them.

Katie Moats: Micah Parsons

Fans’ morale is unquestionably low now that star linebacker Micah Parsons has announced he’s opting out of the upcoming season to prepare for the 2021 NFL Draft.

Now that Parsons and his dynamic bowling skills have left State College and Linebacker U forever, his addition as a cardboard cutout in Beaver Stadium might just give the team the motivation it needs to beat Ohio State this season without the benefit of the White Out.

Michael Tauriello: Sean Clifford In An Armchair

Sure, you’re welcome to say that having Sean Clifford both in the stands and on the field is pointless. To me, though, having the idea of an “armchair quarterback” is essential to the cardboard cutout business in football. Every game has them with fans in the stands, so why not literally have a quarterback in an armchair when the fans can’t be in the stands?

Fans of both word play and the concept of yelling at a game you have no control over alike would be more than pleased to be represented.

Matt DiSanto: Russ Rose

Beaver Stadium’s cardboard cutout gallery wouldn’t be complete without legendary women’s volleyball coach Russ Rose. The unanimous college volleyball G.O.A.T. would likely inspire confidence in nearly every athlete who catches a glimpse of him on the sidelines.

Plus, Rose simply wins. With 1299 career victories under his belt, Rose’s cardboard presence would undoubtedly serve as the good luck charm this Nittany Lions team needs heading into an especially unusual season.

Alysa Rubin: The Joe Paterno Statue

If we can’t have the real statue, can we at least get a cardboard cutout? Thanks in advance.

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Staff

Posts from the all-student staff of Onward State.

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