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Collegian’s Dick and Jane Become Born-Again Virgins, Start New Abstinence Column For Onward State

The Daily Collegian's sex columnists Dick and Jane are newly born-again virgins. They have stopped writing their sex column to pursue a new topic: Abstinence. They will now write for Onward State every Thursday about not having sex and why it's awesome.

PS4RS Listens to ‘Sweet Caroline’ for the First Time, Now Thinks It’s Awful

After several years of arguing that the Neil Diamond hit "Sweet Caroline" should be played in Beaver Stadium, PS4RS has switched its stance, and is now opposed to the song being played anywhere within a 60 mile radius of State College.

Gaff Bouncers Resign, Become THON R&R Captains

THON has just announced that bouncers from the Shandygaff will serve as the newest Rules and Regulations Captains for 2015.

Beyoncé Announced as Surprise Movin’ On Headliner

Sources now confirm that Penn Stater’s will finally get a chance to see the pop queen, as this year’s surprise headlining act at the Movin’ On spring music festival.

Kenan Thompson, Michael Ian Black to Perform at Penn State

Stand-up comedian Michael Ian Black will perform at Penn State on April 7 at Alumni Hall. One week later, comedian and actor Kenan Thompson will perform a stand-up show at Eisenhower Auditorium on April 14 at 8 p.m. Both are performing as part of SPA's Comedy Month.

Reported Kidnapping On Penn State’s Campus Did Not Happen, Release Says

Penn State Police have determined that a kidnapping reported to have happened on Jan. 28 on Shortlidge Road did not actually happen, according to a Penn State release.

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