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Ways to Keep Yourself Entertained During Graduation

Graduation, without a doubt, is a major milestone for most people in the US of A. Unfortunately, the actual commencement ceremony is not as glamorous as it may seem, with the event taking up a considerable amount of time which could otherwise be spent with friends and family at a more social location.

Here at Onward State, we want the Class of 2014 to enjoy the graduation ceremony. Sure, listen to the commencement speeches, but here are some things for you to do to make your time sitting through commencement a bit more entertaining.

1. Tinder

Perhaps you’ve been avoiding the dating app because of the possibility of swiping left or right for a particular person and then later seeing that individual on campus or at a bar. Or perhaps you have the notion that Tinder is for the thirsty (shame on you if that’s the case, you judgmental human. *shakes fist*).

Think about it: A venue filled to the brim with classmates (and family and friends) who are sitting for hours on end just to see you walk across the stage for less than a minute, and who are more or less likely to leave State College within a few days. The odds are extremely high that after the ceremony, you will likely never have to see these people ever again. Swipe away!

2. Telephone

This is particularly fun if you are sitting next to a few of your friends to get the crowd going. Bonus points if you pass along the message to whoever’s on stage.

3. 2048

This relatively new game has plagued students with addiction, and I’ve seen it with my own eyes. Many have refused to begin playing the game because they know of its capability to distract from studying and class time. Once addicted, however, your graduation ceremony may fly quicker than imagined!

Make 2048 — or 4096, if you’re feeling extra motivated — the last huge accomplishment of your Penn State career!

4. Selfies

If you attended graduation and didn’t take a selfie with your neighbors during the ceremony, did you actually graduate?

The answer is no, but selfies on-stage are encouraged.

5. I Spy

This classic “in a crowded room and am bored” game is a good one to play with your neighbors. Count those around you sleeping, obnoxious mortar boards, and leg shakers.

**********

Now, you ask how on earth these fun activities can be accomplished during an excrutiatingly long ceremony. May I further suggest some things for you to prepare pre-graduation:

A. Cordless Phone Charger

These may be an external battery that needs charged prior to the ceremony, or one of those nifty charger-phone cases. Tinder can’t just quit mid-ceremony! And I guess you’d need to contact your family before and after the ceremony.

B. Sew Pockets into Your Gown

Though the handsome, well dressed gentlemen of Penn State are sure to wear pants that have pockets to store your wallet and phone, the ladies are not too fortunate to have dresses that are quite so functional. A solution is to take some navy string, and sew a patch of cloth (maybe cut up an old highlighter party t-shirt) onto the inside of your gown. Voila! a DIY pocket to carry your belongings. (Note: be careful not to put too heavy of items in said pocket; it may drag your gown down to look deformed.)

C. Fanny Pack

Penn State is a magical place, where, in the year 2014, many students possess a fanny pack mainly due to their extensive involvement in THON. Albeit a bit bulky depending on the design of the fanny pack, this is a discreet way of carrying your belongings into graduation.

About the Author

Yuka Narisako

Yuka legally immigrated to the United States via airplane in 1996 from the small island nation of Japan. Since then she has migrated throughout the country and now identifies herself as a senior majoring in Architectural Engineering. The Shandygaff is her Happy Place, though she was once kicked out of the establishment after breaking her shoe and screaming “I LOVE DAY DRINKING. I’M HAVING FUN.” Yuka is overly enthusiastic about life in general, but especially Ja Rule, Halloween, and the puffy black vest she purchased from the Gap. You can reach her at [email protected], or through Twitter @yukahontass.

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