PSU news by
Penn State's student blog

Topics

About

Drunk Student Attempts to Steal Hot Pockets, Gets Caught Immediately

Late night drunken cravings can land you in some serious trouble if you’re not careful, and we’re not talking about loading up on calories at Canyon Pizza.

According to State College police, a 20-year old Penn State student attempted to steal boxes of Hot Pockets and Pizza Rolls from McLanahan’s on Sunday night around 11 p.m. In a humorous but overall poor attempt, police said the student decided to blatantly stick the two boxes in his pants and tried to walk out of the store.

Upon noticing a larger than normal bulge, a McLanahan’s store manager nabbed the larcenist.

Police said the student was noticeably intoxicated and uncooperative, as drunken hunger tends to make people. However, the law is the law, and the student is now facing three citations for retail theft, public intoxication, and underage drinking.

Moral of the story: It’s always best to just bite the bullet and give up the six dollars for shitty frozen food.

About the Author

Jon Deasy

is a senior majoring in criminology from the Steel City. You can find him at the Rathskeller on a Saturday or in the library at four in the morning. He plans to attend law school in the future and enjoys writing about college kids committing the most comical crimes in State College. When he’s not busy, he’s aimlessly staring at his Twitter, @jon_deasy. You can reach him via email at [email protected]

Comments

More by Jon

Cherish The Little Things: Jon Deasy’s Senior Column

How do you sum up four years of life changing experiences into one column? You can’t, but I can leave you with one piece of advice: cherish the little things.

Better Know A Bar: Chrome Liquor Lounge

Student Punches Landlord In Attempt To Get Out Of Lease

Athletics

Penn State Women’s Volleyball Releases 2018 Schedule

Russ Rose’s Nittany Lions won’t play a single home match in September, electing to test themselves against teams like Stanford and Oregon early in the season.

Penn State Hoops Alumnus Joonas Suotamo’s Journey To Becoming Chewbacca Featured On ESPN’s ‘E:60’

Evaluating Tony Carr’s Performance At The 2018 NBA Draft Combine

Penn State Hockey Commit Evan Bell Wins Clark Cup With USHL’s Fargo Force

Center Ludvig Larsson Transfers To Penn State Hockey From Merrimack

Student Life

10 Questions With 2019 Class Gift Director Tom Beeby

Tom Beeby will serve as the 2019 Class Gift Executive Director.

Career Services To Launch Integrated Career Management & Recruiting Platform

Penn State Esports Wins Tespa Collegiate Hearthstone Championship

Plans Submitted For New KFC In State College

Developers have submitted preliminary land development plans to build a new KFC restaurant at 1780 S. Atherton St. in State College.

Predicting Penn State’s 2018 Kickoff Times

As the Nittany Lions have ascended back into college football’s elite, they’ve taken the field at night more often in the past few years and avoided the dreaded early kickoff.

Career Services To Launch Integrated Career Management & Recruiting Platform

Penn State Career Services will launch Nittany Lion Careers on June 18.

Be the first to know

  • Top posts and the best Penn State stories

Thank you for subscribing.

Something went wrong.

10 Questions With 2019 Class Gift Director Tom Beeby

Tom Beeby will serve as the 2019 Class Gift Executive Director.

Send this to a friend