The Great Wings Over Bracket Pt. 1: The Introduction
“And believe me, a good piece of chicken can make anybody believe in the existence of God.” – Sherman Alexie
Wings Over, the venerable chain of chicken joints, has developed a following in Happy Valley that borders on religion. If you go to Storrs or Farmingdale or Amherst, the reaction when you mention the place just doesn’t touch Penn State’s love affair. Hot, boneless, crispy, and saucy, Wings Over embodies everything that is good about drunk food. But if you’ve ever tried to order for a large group, you’d know that those who love the place take their preferences very, very seriously. You’ll hear arguments vast and varied. Hell, the ranch versus bleu cheese debate has been known to tear roommates apart.
Well, it’s time, once and for all, to settle the most pressing debate mankind has ever seen: What is the best menu item at Wings Over Happy Valley?
The rules are simple. We have listed 32 menu items from the restaurant. These represent every variety flavor of boneless wings, waffle fries, french fries, and onion rings. If it isn’t deep fried and boneless, it’s not on the list. The ribs and grilled chicken may have their merits, but this is the time for the deep fryer to shine. We are asking you, our loyal readers, to select your four favorite flavors. From those responses, we will divide and seed the wings and fried sides into a bracket made up of four regions. This will be done like the NCAA basketball tournament, just half the size and without play-in games. From there, we will go from region to region and post polls. You will all vote on which flavor wins each matchup. In the end, we will have a Final Four and, eventually, a champion.
Ladies and Gentlemen, welcome to The Great Wings Over Bracket, the most daring endeavor in Onward State’s illustrious history. Please vote for four choices below and help us seed, and together, we will pick the best flavor to grace the distinguished palates of Wings Over connoisseurs. Let’s do this.