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68-Year Old Allegedly Caught Masturbating in Library Stairwell

So. Here’s a thing that allegedly happened over the weekend: A 68-year old man was caught masturbating in the stairwell of the Schlow Library, according to the Centre Daily Times.

A staff member reportedly caught the man in the middle of the act on Friday at 1 p.m., when she called the police. But by the time they arrived, he had left, perhaps in search of some damn privacy. In a strange twist, library employees knew the man and were able to identify him.

Police told the CDT that the man would be charged with open lewdness, and that his identity would remain secret until charges were filed.

And so concludes your annual public masturbation story.

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About the Author

Tim Gilbert

Former Managing Editor of this site, now just makes lots of #content for it from the Phyrst’s Table 69. Senior from Philadelphia. First-generation Penn Stater. I might go to law school after this, but I might not, too. “For the Glory” is in my email signature because I’m a douche. [email protected] is my email if you want to tell me why I suck. Alternatively, you can call me out on Twitter @OlGilb.

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