Onward State has provided me with the most amazing opportunities, but never in my life could I have imagined that it would lead me to take a ride in the Oscar Mayer Wienermobile.

Honey Glazed Cam and At The Grill Alex, our drivers, took me and three other staffers for a quick spin around campus. To say we were excited would be an understatement.

Cameron and Alex have been busy this week recruiting Penn State students for the job, so we met them near the Huck Life Sciences building, where the Wienermobile has been parked all week.

This thing is huge! I’m talking 27 feet long. It was the biggest wiener I have ever seen, and I am simply going to leave it at that.

The Weinermobile’s doors were what Russ Hanneman would call “the doors of a billionaire. They opened upward, much like Kylie Jenner’s orange Lamborghini. It was at that moment that I knew my clout level was about to rise from 0 to 100.

Alex gave us a “welcome to my crib” tour of the Weenie. The six yellow and red seats were embroidered with a custom Wienermobile detail. Alysa, our photographer, received the honor of sitting “shotbun.”

The aisle was customized with a strip of mustard. The roof was painted like a cloudy sky and amidst it, a sunroof. On the dash were two custom hotdogs.

Honey Glazed Cam flexed on us when she started blaring “Don’t Stop Believin'” through the Wienermobile’s Bluetooth speakers.

We traveled past the library, past West Campus, and ventured downtown. We took a tour of Frat Row and waved at the folks walking along the street. I couldn’t help but wonder whether Alex would Uber me back there on Friday night in the Wienermobile.

Our last stop was at Beaver Stadium for a photoshoot. The Wienermobile is huge, but Beaver Stadium made it look like a wee little weenie.

I learned quite a few pieces of valuable information during my time on the Weinermobile.

1: People’s jaws drop at the site of the Wienermobile.

2: The viral picture of the Wienermobile getting pulled over recently was neither Alex nor Cameron.

3: Penske technicians service the weiners to keep them rolling all year long.

4: This year’s class of drivers is teaming up with those of Planters’ NUTmobile for the ultimate spring break getaway.

If I play my cards right, I might even take a gap year before medical school to drive the Wienermobile across the country. I am going to relish this experience forever.

We had such an amazing time riding the Wienermobile, we even decided to make a TikTok about it. That’s how you know it was a great experience.

@onwardstate

#fyp #W2Step #pennstate #tiktokfashion #CoolRanchDance #psu #travelbucketlist #BestThingSince #foryou #foryoupage

♬ Moon – Kid Francescoli