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Someday I’ll Be Old: Nicole Ambruch’s Senior Column

I came across a photo recently that appeared to be taken at a party. I do not know who took the photo or whose party it was, but when I saw it, it caught my attention. Hung on the wall above all the people was a banner that read, “I hate that someday I’ll be old and I’ll talk about this.”

I stopped and took a second to really let that sink in. All the people I have met, all the places I have been, all the things I have experienced – everything that I have encountered in my 21 years – is all going to be a reminiscence someday.

Although it may sound silly because that is just how life works, as a 21-year-old, the thought never really crosses my mind. I found myself feeling sad at the thought that I am only getting older and my time as a carefree young adult is running out. But I also could not help but think about how lovely it is to reminisce on memories and how lucky I have been to have a life worthy of reminiscing. 

My time at Penn State will be something I think about fondly. These last four years have not only challenged me, but also molded me into someone I am proud to be. I have learned that sometimes hard work pays off, and sometimes it doesn’t. I have learned that confidence, both in your abilities and in yourself, is key. I have learned to always go for it. The opportunity is there; you just have to take the chance.

Taking a chance on yourself is scary, but it is what helps us grow.

As a broadcast journalism major, I am most familiar with video and sound equipment. Heading into my last semester, I had finished all of my core classes and found myself without any classes that required video, editing, or creativity. It bothered me because I needed some sort of creative stimulant. I have always enjoyed taking photos, but never really had a reason to other than for fun. My roommate, Emma, and my friend, Amanda, helped me apply for Onward State as a photographer. They took a chance on me and put me on staff. After seeing the passion and joy this group had, I knew this experience was going to be something great. Although my time was short with Onward State, I learned a lot and I cannot speak highly enough about this organization. Thank you, Onward State, for being great.

I have learned so much in my time here, but I think the most significant thing I have learned is how important it is to surround yourself with good people. And I’ve been blessed with some good people.

I have made many friends throughout my four years – many of whom I met my freshman year and have stuck with by my side the whole way and many of whom I just met during my senior year. Clubs, committees, and classes took complete strangers and turned them into people I look forward to seeing every day.

Something I learned when it comes to friends and relationships is that it is important to surround yourself with people who want to see you be great, and it is also important to be that friend to someone else. In college, your friends are all you have. They are the ones who see you through your darkest times and they are also the ones who cheer you on and lift you up.

These are the people that stay up with you until 4 a.m. having dance parties, who listen to you say “This time, I am finally over him” for the 17th time and are still waiting to hear it 17 more times, who laugh with you until you cannot breathe, and who will help you carry your burdens when you are unable to do it alone. These are the people who I want to reminisce on.

To my 5 and my 6asls: Although we were not all together, we have still managed to keep our bond stronger than ever. You have picked me up when I was down, pushed me to be the best version of myself, and put up with my nonsense. I cannot thank you all enough – my forever friends, I love you all dearly.

To my Gill Girls and Mob: I think we left our mark on Gill Street. This house was the perfect final chapter to my college story and I am so thankful to have lived in a house with the best roommates I could ever ask for. This house was a circus, but I would not have wanted it any other way. From countless parties, daylongs, and late nights, the cops were only called on us once, so I think that’s a Dub. Going out every weekend was always a good time, especially when tequila was involved, but the little things, like cooking together, having silly boy talk, and sitting on the porch are the thing I will miss the most.

To my parents and family: I do not know what else to say besides thank you. You have provided me with nothing but unconditional love and support, and have cheered me on every step of the way. Being away from home for the first time was a scary transition for all of us, but I think we did a good job. I have grown and flourished in my time at Penn State, and that is because I had two amazing parents and a tribe of supporters behind me every step of the way. I am so proud to call you all mine.

Although my senior year did not end as expected, I find myself coming to terms with it. I can be mad, sad, and disappointed, but at the end of the day, these are the cards I have been dealt. I am so grateful to Penn State for giving me the best four years I could have ever imagined.

Someday I will be old and talk about this – and I cannot wait.

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