Power Ranking Park Avenue Army’s Best Chants Following Year-long Hiatus
Groups of 20 loyal Penn State soccer fans returned to Jeffrey Field for the first time since 2019 this week to cheer on the Nittany Lions’ men’s and women’s teams as they began their respective Big Ten Tournaments.
With plenty of time to render new and improved chants and chirps, the Park Avenue Army did not disappoint in its highly anticipated revival during No. 1 Penn State’s match against No. 12 Iowa.
Without further ado, here were the best digs we heard from the Park Avenue Army’s most recent showing.
10. ‘Sir! I disagree!’
The Golden Rule is as follows: “Treat others the way you want to be treated.”
The Park Avenue Army did just that and politely clashed with the line judge’s call near the epicenter of the student section. Although the referee failed to engage in the display of civil discourse, we’re sure he acknowledged the friendly banter.
9. ‘Hey Diane, how’s Iowa? How are the cornfields?’
This one is an all-time classic. Any time Iowa comes to town, as fellow agricultural brothers and sisters, we have to check on their corn, just as they check on our cattle.
8. Polite Goalkick Chirps
Following each and every Hawkeye goal kick, the student section responded with an edgy statement in an attempt to misdirect keeper Macy Enneking. Some of our favorites included:
- “Ohhhh…B-minus!”
- “Ohhhh…below-average level!”
- “Ohhhh…mediocre!”
- “Ohhhh…statistically inferior!”
- “Ohhhh…lacking merit!”
7. ‘I’m blind, I’m deaf, I want to be a ref!’
Hasn’t every fan been there?
6. ‘It’s her birthday. Give her a card!’
Now, this one is clever.
Clearly, Thursday must have marked Iowa’s Samantha’s Carey’s birthday as she picked up two yellow cards, resulting in her ejection late in the match.
5. ‘Diane, have we rattled you? I don’t think you’ve completed a single pass.’
Ouch. Sometimes, the truth hurts.
4. ‘Hey Mike? Do you prefer Me-kee or Me-ike?’
The Park Ave. Army heckled the lone scorer of the match, Meike (pronounced Mi-cah) Ingles, all afternoon by calling her “Mike.”
Early in the match, the quick forward couldn’t help but smile at the constant mispronunciation of her name.
3. ‘That’s two things she can’t get! A real name and a good touch!’
After turning the ball over in the Penn State zone, fans continued to come at the head of Ingles. The forward clearly took the criticism to heart by delivering a sweet scoring strike directly after the taunt.
2. ‘Hey, ref. Say nothing if you want Penn State to win!’
As a surprise to all, the referee, in fact, didn’t say anything!
Despite having bias on the side of the home team, it wasn’t enough to eke out a victory.
1. ‘MIKE! MIKE! MIKE!’
The best chirp of the day, once again, targeted Meike Ingles.
The section mimicked the seagulls in “Finding Nemo” who are notorious for yelling “Mine! Mine! Mine!” in the hit Disney-PIXAR film. The section took the same approach by screaming “Mike! Mike! Mike!” each time the flashy forward touched the ball.
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