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Penn State Canon Events

Being a Penn Stater is a memorable experience. Hundreds of thousands of alumni are proud to call Happy Valley their second home, and they often give back to the community as a thank you for all that they were able to do at Penn State.

There are so many core aspects of college life in State College that almost every Penn Stater will experience before graduation. Within the Penn State Universe (PSU), there are a few events that are so common they could be considered canon.

We compiled a list of Penn State canon events that almost every student has gone through, or will go through, at least once throughout their time here.

The Freshman Frat Search

If you’ve ever been downtown on a cool, weekend evening, you’ve probably seen a horde of students wandering the streets in identical going-out outfits. Every fall semester, freshmen band together in large groups to scour the town for a good party.

We’ve all been new to Penn State at one point or another, and it’s a canon event to seek out the moral support of 20 to 30 other first-years in hopes of finding a party. The hive mentality of it all is something that should be studied, but if anything, the group effort might just get you into at least one frat. Maybe.

Leaving Your Winter Coat At Home

Between early walks to your 8 a.m. and late trips home from the frats, you’re going to wish you brought a jacket to campus with you. While the alcohol you consumed on your night out might save you from ruining your nice coat in a frat house, it can’t help you on your 20-minute walk to the Forum Building the next morning.

The fall semester at Penn State is a classic case of false advertising, as temperatures in Happy Valley go from 100 to zero before your mom can mail your coat to you.

If you think you can make it until Thanksgiving break without at least a windbreaker, remember this canon event and think again.

Almost Getting Hit By A CATA Bus

Being a pedestrian at Penn State is usually a pretty easy gig. You can cross the street whenever you want and cars have to stop for you, campus and downtown are extremely walkable, and your biggest concern is going up one of Happy Valley’s many hills. However, the one threat to look out for is the CATA buses.

Every Penn State student has half-wished for a CATA bus to hit them and pay off all of their tuition in the process, and every Penn State student has almost actually been hit by one. Whether it was your own fault or the driver’s, almost being flattened by a CATA bus is a Penn State canon event.

Parking In Lot 43

The highly coveted on-campus parking pass comes with its quirks, and one of those quirks is Lot 43. While the convenience of overnight parking is hard to come by in State College, let alone on campus, the distance from everything makes this canon event a rough one.

As a long-term lot for off-campus students, Lot 43 isn’t exactly centrally located to anything students would want to go to, except maybe Beaver Stadium. The near-30-minute walk to some of the most central buildings on campus, like the Willard Building and the HUB, is sure to have you out of breath by the time you get to class. Getting to and from your downtown apartment isn’t any quicker, but a parking spot is a parking spot.

The Ticketmaster Trauma

This one is a life-changing, possibly life-ruining, canon event. Attempting to buy Penn State football season tickets for the first time is a core memory for students, and it’s not always a happy one. Penn Staters are full of team spirit until they join the battlefield that is the Ticketmaster queue, and then all bets are off.

Dragging yourself out of bed before 7 a.m. on a summer day just to possibly not get your hands on the tickets is a memory that will stick with someone for life. Maybe, if you’re lucky, you’ll purchase the tickets with ease first try, but if you don’t? Our condolences.

First Off-Campus Housing Experience

Everyone knows a guy who moved into the Meridian sophomore year thinking his life was about to change. That in itself is a canon event. Living in your first apartment is exciting no doubt, but thinking that an overpriced, unrenovated college apartment will make your life a movie is, sadly, a false hope.

Den Tuesday

This is a canon event that some might wish to forget. Circling back to the subjects of the first event in this list, this one speaks for itself.

Having Too Much Fun At A Tailgate

Penn State is an avid football school and as fans, Penn Staters know how to have a good time before the game. Whether it’s a noon game or a 7:30 p.m. kickoff, people will be tailgating. Tailgating is arguably the safest way to consume alcohol as there’s usually food, water, and most importantly, time, to get you through the day and into the stadium by kickoff.

Still, accidents happen, and sometimes the plethora of alcohol available to you at a tailgate becomes a little too tempting. Maybe you find yourself needing to sit down for a while or worse, heading home before the game even begins, and you realize you’ve pushed beyond your limit. It happens to the best of us, making blacking out at a Penn State tailgate a canon event.

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About the Author

Megan Dougherty

Megan Dougherty is a senior majoring in English and an associate editor at Onward State. She loves making music, consuming the maximum daily amount of coffee recommended by the FDA, and overanalyzing Taylor Swift lyrics. Feel free to follow her on Instagram @meganedougherty and forward any (free) The Eras Tour tickets to her email, [email protected]

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