If you’ve ever been to THON late at night or early in the morning, you’ve probably seen the Zamboni-looking cleaning machines on the floor. They look goofy, they move slowly, and they look fun to ride.

This got us thinking, what other things can these cleaning vehicles do? If you ever thought the same, then this is the post for you.

Racing

“They see me rolling, they hating.” Imagine seeing these things rip around the concourse of the Bryce Jordan Center. Put some lights on them, maybe attach a speaker, and watch them fly. Not only would it be fun to watch, but the floors would get clean too.

It would also probably take two hours, but the finish line would be electric.

Jousting

The buildup to when the two jousters actually make contact would be insane. The two slow-moving machines creeping forward with their drivers aiming to knock off the other would be a spectacle that would take 10 minutes to finish.

Jousting was a sinful sport from the Middle Ages, but now it’s a patient sport that uses two janitorial vehicles. What a world we live in.

Demolition Derby

Let’s see these mean, cleaning, perhaps fighting, machines plow into one another. There would need to be a lot more than the four, or so, vehicles that are usually out there for this to work, but how fun would this be to watch?

Although, if they do get destroyed, the floor wouldn’t get clean, so it’s a give-and-take type of deal.

Tug Of War

Here’s an idea. We connect a rope to the back of two cleaners and they drive in opposite directions to see who can win. What could go wrong?

Sumo Wrestling

This is similar to the demolition derby, but it’s just two Zambonis. We put them in a circle and they have to push each other out of play. Again, this may result in some broken parts and part of the dance floor being left dirty, but it’s totally worth it.

Obstacle Course

It takes a true master of janitorial equipment to complete this task. We set up cones and hazards on the dance floor, and not only do the Zambonis still have to clean, but they have to do so creatively and as fast as possible.

This competition will set apart the true Zamboni drivers from the fraudulent ones.

Precision Parking

This is part two of the obstacle course. Precision parking takes a true master of their craft to complete successfully. Tight spaces and dirty floors better be aware of these nifty clean machines.