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about 11 months ago

Karl Rominger Goes Crazy in Deadspin Q&A

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The Jerry Sandusky trial has been over for a couple weeks now, but one of his attorneys is still making the news. Karl Rominger, Sandusky’s co-counsel, has become well known for his off-the-wall Twitter comments. He smokes fat cigars, drinks with college kids at Zeno’s, and just generally has an attitude that people who represent serial pedophiles wouldn’t normally have.

Yesterday, he agreed to do a live chat on Deadspin, which turned into quite a shitshow. Below are some of the best and quirkiest responses from the chat.

Q: Karl. Thanks for joining us. I’ll go first. Given the overwhelming nature of the victim testimony against Sandusky, was defending this case more difficult than you imagined?

Rominger: We knew it would be tough, but hey even you guys noticed us take a few punches instead of spinning plates and juggling…

Q: Totally hypothetical question: What do you when a client wants to hire you and you think, “This guy is guilty as hell.” How do you reconcile that?

Rominger: You reconcile a check book too.

Q: What, in your opinion, happened to Ray Gricar?

Rominger: He was an odd bird way back.. I did a DUI up there years ago, and his behavior was not “ordinary” even then.

Q: How come Lawyerin’ Joe didn’t plead insanity? Not for Sandusky, but for himself.

Rominger: Lawyerin” Joe is pretty F’n smart. Trust me, his legal acumen is way better than average.. yes, seriously.

Q: Mr. Rominger, how is Jerry Sandusky handling himself since the verdict? Can you give any insight as to his daily routine and what is next for him?

Rominger: Jail = not fun.

Q: How would you have represented an equally sympathetic and believable defendant such as The Hamburglar

Rominger: Blame it on the clown.

Q: Honestly, getting Sandusky off on 3 our of 48 counts had to be a win in your representation, right? I mean, that is a testament to some good lawyerin’.

Rominger: Listen, 2nd place is for losers.. we ain’t done yet.

Q: How on God’s green earth did you think Jerry Sandusky was innocent. Are you from a parallel universe where raping kids was normal behavior?

Rominger: I just use a constitution from time to time.. it says you’re innocent until after the trial.. North Korea could use more scholars like you.

Q: Three counts dismissed, moral victory?

Rominger: Hey I crossed the redhead

Q: Would you let Jerry Sandusky babysit your kids?

Rominger: Him maybe, you no.

Q: That’s a finely manicured goatee. How do you keep it like that? Mine always gets scraggly and I can’t keep it even. Also, pedophiles. Ain’t they just a bunch of crazy motherfuckers?

Rominger: Well I shaved the goat off.. for now.. but it comes in handy when walking through the brush chasing deer – perhaps the constant run through the brambles keeps it so svelte. as for pedophilia, you are correct it’s a diagnosis

Q: As a followup to an earlier question, is there a limit to what you’re willing to defend? For instance, if a client says, “I fucked these kids, but I want you to beat the case for me,” is there a dollar amount that puts your conscience in check?

Rominger: I have never seen enough money to make you do anything the Constitution doesn’t allow.

Q: Hey Karl. My neighbor erected a thirty foot statue of Tony Shalhoub in his front yard, and when I sunbathe naked in the back yard there is no longer any sun. How do you sleep at night?

Rominger: You can sue.. I sleep well.

Q: Whats your hourly rate?

Rominger: For Deadspin fans just $13.66 and hour, plus an hourly fuel surcharge of $286.34

Q: How much Dairy Queen did you eat in those two weeks?

Rominger: 3 large Heath Frosties – other than that it was Cappuccino

Q: Have you ever seen anyone own more hideous ties than Jerry?

Rominger: Yes.. most SPORTS COMMENTATORS

Q: Is being Jerry Sandusky’s other attorney the legal equivalent of being the backup singer in Pete Best’s other band?

Rominger: It’s like being the lead for Milli Vanilli

It’s easy to see why some people might qualify Rominger as nuts, but no one can question his wit. In any case, he seemed to enjoy the Deadspin exercise, according to his Twitter (@karl_rominger):

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Sandusky Scandal - On November 5, 2011, a 23-page Grand Jury report rocked Penn State to its foundation. As a result of Jerry Sandusky being convicted on 45 of 48 counts sexual abuse against 10 minors and subsequent fallout and alleged coverup by several key school administrators and legendary coach Joe Paterno, these events will forever be a dark stain in the history of our University. Read more