The one weekend during the year where we all get to dress up in slutty outfits and pretend that it’s cute has come and gone. In the spirit of this spectacular holiday, I decided to go around campus and find some creepy spots that tend to go unnoticed.

If you think you know of a creepier spot that I didn’t find (totally impossible) that’s cool, because it’s not like you’re going to spite me and post a photo to Onward State Facebook Page.

Anyways,  here we go!

1:  Old Main’s Creepy Stone Arches

So I found this arch by walking down a staircase at Old Main, it seems negligible except that there’s a trashcan there.  Who uses that? Who could possibly ever need to use that trashcan? Who comes from behind those sketchy doors to smoke a cigarette or throw away garbage? Reminds me of Edgar Allen Poe’s Cask of Amontillado, for some reason.

There’s another arch down down the other staircase. This one led into a courtyard — but you can see in between that there is another white door. Look at that old  door.

Only one of two things could possibly be behind it — A classy underground cigar lounge for the president or a white demon thing that waits for the door to be opened.

 2: Mueller Lab

This is an all-inclusive phobia room.  Except that it’s a walk-in freezer. I loved the complete darkness, weird smell, and stainless steel ambience, you know? The derelict ceiling tiles helps the whole psychopath evil doctor scene.  Seriously though, why was this thing unlocked? Did I break a rule?

Here’s a cool underground passage at Mueller Lab, except that it wasn’t cool at all and I’m never going down there again.

3: Sparks Building

I bet you didn’t know Sparks has a “sub-basement.”  I didn’t either until I found it by accident.  This isn’t actually a room, it’s an opening in the wall I couldn’t even fit through. I’m not really sure how anything was stuffed into this crawl space without the use of child labor.

Unless you’ve had a class down here, you’d never know about this perfect horror movie office. It was filled with 70’s furniture, toys, and a tv. I am half-convinced this was at one point a bomb shelter. It was weird, there was like a coffee room to the side and it had been used recently except NO ONE was down there. I did hear noises though and I nearly got trapped between two sets of locked doors when I tried dipping out.

You see that? This is under Sparks 10 auditorium. Apparently, Mary Jane came in and left her name there. What other things like this are just hidden on this campus from years past?

4: Burrowes Building makes no sense at all

Okay, so you might notice that rooms 210, 229 and 230 just don’t exist, according to this sign.  That’s not all that surprising, I guess. Instead, I want to know whose dumb ass idea was it to put nearly a third of Burrowes’ second floor…. on a different… second floor? It wouldn’t be that bad if it were at least in numerical order, like the first 10 rooms.

Don’t look for room 211 on the second floor — that makes way too much sense.

I almost didn’t think too much about this doorway.  Except it was just way too ordinary to not be there. After some reasoning, it all made sense to me. I figured out why Burrowes makes no sense:

The whole building is straight from Harry Potter. Only Wizards can walk through this door. The place changes shape and there probably is a Minotaur somewhere but he’s like a janitor or grad student.

5:  Old Botanical Lab

Nearly everyone has seen this building without ever noticing it. I had no idea it was even a place or thing, but when I saw it I had to check it out.

I crept in the basement and it led me to this bathroom. It’s tiny. And I think someone was doing their laundry down there — I’m not even kidding about that. You should check this building out, it’s crazy nice upstairs.

6: Whitmore Lab 

Lab coats and metal tanks of gas. Just all of this is half terrifying and half 100% awesome.  I just imagine some crazy scientists using all this stuff for some weird Frankenstein like lab experiment.

7: Osmond Arches

I thought this was a lot creepier when I took the picture, okay? I mean, something peculiar could happen here right?

8: Frear South

Frear:  A combination of fear and rear. I had to walk down an outside staircase for this picture, and I couldn’t get inside. Does this remind anyone else of Breaking Bad? I’m not a professional whatsoever, but if I had to say, this is the perfect place to make illicit pharmaceuticals. (What is this place, actually?)

9:  Steidle Building

Gothic-esque feel to it, right?  The high-spire windows kind of freak me out, even though it’s plain.  I walked through this building just to check it out — they have tubing going through it to send packages and old showers in the men’s room.  Unused since 1970’s.

10:  The Willard Mural? 

Have you ever walked by the North-west side of Willard and noticed this weird cave? No, really, it actually exists.

Go through that cave and boom goes the dynamite.

This mural.

They don’t show you this treasure during any Liontour. I’m bringing this little trinket to light, it’s just way too cool.  Next time you want some peace and quiet when you smoke a cig, you don’t have to listen to the Preacher while you do it.

11:  These Ducks will calm you down.

They’re adorable. Don’t worry, everything’s cool.