April Allergies Bring… May Misery?
Spring: it’s like somebody hit the technicolor button after a dreary, grey (mostly snowless) winter. It’s the time when the weather turns gorgeous, and it happens to be one of my favorite seasons. However, spring has an ugly side, just waiting to attack the masses.
This brings me to the oh-so-wonderful topic of allergies. Everything is in bloom, which means that the notorious “semen trees” (you know, those trees that smell AWFUL…but have such pretty flowers!) are stinking up the campus, buds are forming on trees, drenching cars and everything else with their pollen, and flowers are spurting up from the ground. Oh, and who can forget that it’s officially lawn mowing season?
Enter the kids who go to class looking like they’ve had a long cry, they’re high, or they look downright miserable.
Allergy season isn’t all that bad though…because while you’re suffering and miserable and feel like death, you get to look at all of the beautiful blossoms. You also get to experience State in full color, rather than the boring, drab shades of grey and brown.
In the meantime, here’s a list of things that may or may not help all of you allergy sufferers find some relief from all of the suffering.
5. Invest in a bubble suit.
Okay, so this might not be a practical idea, but how much fun would it be to bounce around campus in one of those sweet suits? By being in a bubble, you’re completely sealed off from all of the pollen spores circulating in the air (as well as every other allergen known to man), and you’d probably be one of the coolest kids on campus. Plus the idea of rolling all around the Old Main lawn in a bubble just sounds like it would be the most fun you could have in the spring. Although, there are two downsides to the suit: all of the pollen would cover the bubble, making it impossible to see out of. Drunk bros might also find it funny to kick or throw you around for the fun of it.
Hibernating is always a good idea. Instead of daylonging, just sleep all day, not coming out of your cave. You are a bear. You are angry. Do you really want to release your awful wrath on the world? When you’re sniffling and sneezing and miserable, you could turn into the world’s biggest grump. Hibernation is best. Who needs to go to class anyway?
3. Suck it up.
Just deal with your allergies. Go to class being miserable, grumpy, and stuffy. Who cares if you look like death? Make everybody else around you that is lucky enough not to be allergic to nature even more miserable. Make as much noise sniffling as possible to maybe even get kicked out of class for being a disruption. Just be kind enough to carry your own tissues (and garbage bag to trash the tissues in…don’t leave them around for others! EW!).
2. Go buy some allergy medicine.
In all seriousness, sometimes the best thing to do is go buy Allegra, Claritin, Benadryl, Zyrtec, or some sort of a decongestant. The medicine (particularly the ________+D OTC medicines) WILL help relieve your symptoms, making you feel much better. But be warned. Some allergy medicines can make you really drowsy, like Benadryl, so it might not be best to take that right after you wake up to feel better.
1. Go to a doctor.
When all else fails, and you’re still miserable, maybe you just have a really bad cold. Maybe you have allergies that can’t be combatted with OTC medicines. Maybe you actually need shots to desensitize you to all of the allergens that plague you. Going to a doctor will help you out the most, especially if they give you an allergy medicine that can’t be found over the counter (yet). There’s always the downside of being told you need to go through extensive testing to see what you’re allergic to, and the possibility of getting injections, but in the long run, would you rather be miserable or feel much better?
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