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Smelly Smoker Finds eCigs Way Cooler Than Expected

Hi, I’m Steve, and I’ve been a smelly smoker guy in your class for about 5 or so years now. (“Hi Steve”).

I had thought I was getting better at the whole “quitting” thing after I had called it quits with cigarettes more times than I care to admit. However, it turns out practice does not, in fact, make a smoke free person. It became a long running joke among my friends that I had “quit” once again, only to gradually find me saying “only when I’m drunk,” or “well I had a stressful day,” and so on.

However, on a recent trip back from my hometown of “OutsideofPhilly,” also known as Bucks County, I stumbled upon the whole electronic cigarette craze.

This was done on a whim because of the fact that my mother (much like other superhuman mom-powers: holding hot pots with bare hands, 360 degree vision, and the ability to always walk in a room just when a sex scene comes on the tv), can smell a cigarette’s presence like a bloodhound. It is because I fear this supernatural ability that I bought my first ecig from Wawa so that I could get my nicotine fix while driving her car without having her smelling it in her automobile and getting lectured about bad habits.

I fell in love with the first puff.

When I finally got back to State College I found that every single store that sells cigarettes now has a stand of either NJoy brand, or Blu brand disposable eCigs, something I had never noticed before I had dove into the vaporizing phenomenon. These disposables claim to last about the duration of about 2 packs (I find it’s much less than that) and cost anywhere from seven to ten dollars, coming in different strengths and menthol options. I have bought to date about six of these in the past month or so before I decided I was hooked.

It helped that I didn’t need to have a lighter, I could smoke whenever for however long I liked, and I could happily discretely puff on my ecig in several bars at State College without being given a hard time. Since there is no smell and “second hand vapor” is not exactly life threatening like its smokey counterpart, I haven’t had a problem yet with anyone telling me to put it away as long as I’m not being obnoxious about it and making other customers uncomfortable.

Here’s a small shpeal on what they are all about: eCigs are made up of  battery, a cartridge of “smoke juice” which contains nicotine and a flavored solvent, and an atomizer. When you take a drag, the atomizer turns the smoke juice into water vapor, which you inhale, getting a nicotine fix, and when you exhale in looks like a regular cigarette’s smoke (which vaporizing enthusiasts call “analogs”). The water vapor is a bit of a different feeling than smoke however, its’ temperature is no higher than your body’s and can feel a bit harsher at first before you get used to it.

As for what makes it a better alternative, the facts are these: No Smoke, no odor, no tar, no carbon monoxide, and none of the massive amounts of random stuff they put in cigarettes, like harmful chemicals and flavor additives like Ambergris (whale vomit) or Urea (a chemical found in your urine). All you are really getting in a puff is exactly what you crave, the nicotine itself, and all you are putting out is water.

However, that is not to say that certain smoke juice isn’t questionable. Most of the eCig smoke juice is made in China, and the FDA is not monitoring exactly what these companies are putting in it, so be sure to do some research and buy from reputable sources before you inhale foreign mixes.

I decided to be economic about my new favorite vice, and so I went and did hours of research to find a starter kit online so I could call it quits with the expensive disposables. I decided upon the V-2 eCig after reading that it is arguably the best in the market over and over again. I picked up my package Thursday morning, and have been happily vaping since for a fraction of the price of when I was smoking packs. It is a lot cheaper to vaporize than it is to smoke.

I choose the Red flavor which is made to taste something like a Marlboro, and vanilla which tastes something like heaven. Their smoke juice ranges in flavors from coffee, menthol, chocolate, mint, and several others. However, you can buy smoke juice in bulk to fill your cartridges with that range of flavors within a spectrum not unlike Baskin & Robin’s. These smoke juices all have a range of nicotine levels from high, medium, low, to no nicotine at all if you are trying to cut out nicotine altogether.

I can honestly say that I have quit smoking cigarettes and no interest in smoking an “analog” ever again. I failed with the patch, the gum, cold turkey, as well as telling friends to give me a good backhand if they saw me smoking when I was drunk. This is the only thing I have ever found to work for me.

Also, there is another awesome benefit to smoking eCigs, and that is that Big Tobacco hates them. They have been lobbying against them big time recently because they realize the potential threat to their industry. Their approach has been to try and publicize potential threats, which is funny considering their product. I, for one, love taking one of the most corrupt, murderous, scheming, government-controlling, truly awful corporate organizations in the world, and throwing up my deuces. They will not see another cent from me, and that’s one of my favorite aspects.

Anyways, while my V-2 is the best I have ever tried, if you are interested in making a big life change, I would recommend going out and trying one of the disposables. The Blu comes in menthol and non-menthol, and is available at McLanahans, Snappy’s and Fresh & Fill. However, I find that their tobacco flavoring tastes more like coffee than tabacco. NJoy brand can be found at Snappy’s and CVS, and comes in Menthol, Bold (which is very strong, be warned), and Gold, which I found rather enjoyable.

You can check out my own personal review and demonstration of my V-2 Starter kit here, and while I recommend it, I suggest you do some research before making any big purchases. Mine put me back about 55 dollars.

So say no more to yellowed fingers and teeth, no more to that smelly wardrobe and apartment, no more to getting shut down in the dating scene because you’re a smoker, no more to hacking in the shower in the morning and no more to avoiding parents or lovers when you sneak a cigarette. Give the vapor a go.

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About the Author


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