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The 10 Kids You See On Snapchat’s Campus Story

Snapchat’s Campus Story is a never-ending saga. One day it’s there, the next it completely vanishes from your recent updates. Whenever the Campus Story is present, it’s quite the treat to most students. Unfortunately, it has become a bit tasteless through these last few months, as the same Snaps keep popping up day after day.

Every time you open up the Campus Story, there is a young student celebrating his or her 21st birthday, the standard Old Main shot, or yet another trend that nobody really cared to see in the first place. The redundancy is agonizing. Aside from a select group of kids that pop up every so often, the Campus Story is becoming a lost cause. So, in a drastic attempt to try to shake things up, point out the all-too-obvious, and make it a little more interesting, here are the 10 people we constantly see on Snapchat.

1. The early risers

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If you got up at 5 a.m. and didn’t Snapchat it, did it really even happen? Every morning you wake up and refresh the Campus Story, it’s usually some poor soul heading to early morning practice. Other times, it’s another lost student struggling to get home after a lousy one-night stand or someone who just woke up after downing a fifth of vodka. Regardless, they never miss a chance to submit a picture of Old Main with a big time stamp just to let the town know how miserable life is at the moment.

2. The count-downers

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Okay guys, we get it. Assuming you’re reading this at noon, we have one week and 12 hours until spring break. Or, 180 hours in total. Or, 10,800 minutes. Or, a total of 648,000 seconds. We are all more than capable of counting. We don’t need you guys letting us know exactly when DaeSean Hamilton’s birthday is.

3. The 21st birthday celebrators

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It’s truly an amazing time to be alive when celebrating the big 21. What’s even more exciting is when your birthday pregame makes the Campus Story! Every single night, we get a glimpse of what it’s like to take that last sip of illegal alcohol before stumbling over the Phyrst to don the ever-famous green cap. But in all seriousness, is the cake and happy birthday song really worth it when the guest of honor can’t even stand, let alone blow out 21 candles?

4. The campus walkers

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Every single day, there’s always someone bundled up like Mom used to dress us before heading to the bus stop, complaining about how cold the weather is and why it won’t stop snowing. We get it — it’s winter in State College and warm weather is nothing but a myth.

5. The classroom Snapchatters

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Okay, this is one of the Snaps that I truly enjoy since the classes I indulge myself in are incredibly boring this semester. I love to see random stuff blow up during a chemistry lab or a professor showcase his opera skills. Please, keep them coming, for the sake of making others envious in less exciting classes.

6. The animal caretakers

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Who doesn’t love endless videos of puppies and kittens? I mean, the internet is littered (no pun intended) with countless videos just like these for a very specific reason. Whoever you all may be, please do it for the sake of the community. The value of Snapchat depends on your animals.

7. The late night crammers

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Nothing screams procrastination like, “Hey! Let’s take some snaps instead of cramming for our exam in six hours!” The common setting is of course the library as highlighters and notebooks line the table. Yes, you’re bored, but you could be covered in snow like the guy that was showcased before your snap came on, even if he’s lucky enough to be drunk.

8. The piano man

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This kid usually pops up during the later hours of the evening once everyone has settled in for the night. Of course, there are many different piano men, but they are all equally talented. The sound these musicians create is much more mesmerizing than watching some moron flip a solo cup of off his ass. Please, whoever you guys are, keep up the good work.

9. The repeat offenders

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These are undoubtedly the worst Snapchatters on the planet, simply because they lack the creativity to come up with their own #content and thus inhibit the progression of newer trends. Remember the chin scratching, the butt flips, the Oreo on the face? Those trends should have never even been on the Campus Story, let alone taken off like they did. Here’s an idea for some new trends to get started that will probably never get picked up: bong hits, butt chugging, or streaking. Make it happen, Penn State.

10. The innovators

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This is a diverse group of kids because they’re always finding ways to keep us entertained despite the lack of creativity that we normally see in the campus story. Whether, you’re finding new ways to turn the lights on with your feet or simply riding around on a unicycle with a saxophone, you help keep the Campus Story entertaining. Keep it up!

Honorable Mention

You. Maybe someday you’ll be lucky enough to showcase whatever talent or lack thereof you may possess on Penn State’s Campus Story. Please, just do something crazy for a change.

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About the Author

Jon Deasy

is a senior majoring in criminology from the Steel City. You can find him at the Rathskeller on a Saturday or in the library at four in the morning. He plans to attend law school in the future and enjoys writing about college kids committing the most comical crimes in State College. When he’s not busy, he’s aimlessly staring at his Twitter, @jon_deasy. You can reach him via email at [email protected]

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