Power Ranking The HUB’s New Seating

Yesterday, the HUB revealed its long awaited renovation, a spectacle full of natural light, easy access to food, and more than plentiful seating, somewhat resembling an airport food court with a grand staircase in its very center. Being in the crowd of excited students exploring the space, my friend Joe and I naturally had to sit on every seat there was in the space.

After we’d already sat on all the seats, we went around a second time, this time to rank the new seating from best to worst. Some might think it’s too early to judge the HUB’s new seats when they’ve barely been sat on, but we like to pick and choose our favorite resting spot like the territorial mammals we are.

Here’s our scoring criteria for these new seats. They will be judged on three categories: comfort, location/view, and functionality. For each category, the chairs will be given a score between 0 and 5, with 5 being the absolute best. For example, a 0 (zero) on the comfort scale would be equivalent to sitting on two needles each placed strategically in the middle of each butt cheek. A 5 on the comfort scale is what Goldilocks would consider juuuust right. At the end of the day, the chair with the highest cumulative points takes the prize as the Rookie of the Year of HUB seating.

Without further ado, let’s take a look at the newest members of the HUB seating family.

The Dark Green Couch: 

On the upper level of the HUB renovation is a rather comfortable looking couch. Its inviting look enticed me to take a seat. I fully envisioned my bottom being cushioned by the sofa, but I was so wrong. The feeling was if I were to jump and sit on top of a diving board: hard and springy. Because that sounds inappropriate I will change topics and note that the couch looks at preexisting murals along the once dark corridor, the class gift from 2003. However, if you’re trying to watch the people below, you’re out of luck.

  • Comfort: 2
  • Location/View: 3
  • Functionality: 3

Total: 8/15

dark green couch
Don’t be deceived by the pretty green couch.
dark green couch view
The murals are pretty nice to look at, though.

The Wooden Chair:

A group of tables on a more quiet corner of the second level of the renovation offer some quiet from the chaos below. It’s great for someone who is planning on getting a bit of work done. With regards to comfort, you’re sitting in a wooden chair. The view should get higher points once the Green Roof opens up.

  • Comfort: 2
  • Location/View: 2
  • Functionality: 5

Total: 9/15

wooden
You know you’re out of place when you’re sitting at a table without work to do.
wooden view
This location should be a lot more attractive, but noisier once the Green Roof opens up in the spring.

The Steps

The heart of this new renovation is undeniably the staircase connecting the two levels. The center of this staircase is a stepped seating area, complete with electrical outlets. It’s a perfect new meeting place offering the best view. These steps could hypothetically be the new fish tanks of Penn State meeting places. However, because the stairs are made of wood, it’s not a place to be seating for extended amounts of time.

  • Comfort: 2
  • Location/View: 5
  • Functionality: 3

Total: 10/15

steps
These great people I just met and I sharing a few laughs at the new HUB steps.
steps view
Let’s sit and laugh in a circle about the fact that we’re having such a great time and we don’t even know each other!

The Light Green Chair

Around the perimeter of the upper level is an array of the uncomfortable dark green couches facing similarly cushioned light green chairs. These chairs are slightly more comfortable than the couches opposite of them, and offer a nice view of the area below.

  • Comfort: 3
  • Location/View: 4
  • Functionality: 3

Total: 10/15

light green chair w view
He’s envying the fact that I made new friends on the steps from afar.

Modern Blue Chairs

These blue chairs are positioned on the upper level as if to invite you to people watch. Not surprisingly, these chairs are quite mediocre in comfort and lack in enough wiggle room to get some work done. In conclusion, this chair’s strongest point is its prime location for creeping.

  • Comfort: 3
  • Location/View: 5
  • Functionality: 3

Total: 11/15

blue metal legs
Just a man observing the world around him. No headphones, no laptops, just Joe.
blue metal legs view
“So this is the world we live in.”

The Tall Orange Chair

Not your average bar stool, these orange chairs are quite interesting in that its very short back is very discouraging from leaning backwards but also encourages good posture while you’re doing work or enjoying a meal. It’s perfect for the socialite: at the heart of heavy foot traffic and casual enough to glance and say hi to anyone you may recognize.

  • Comfort: 2
  • Location/View: 4
  • Functionality: 5

Total: 11/15

tall dining short back
Just looking for friendly faces, ya know?
tall dining short back view
Is that Maggie coming down the steps? Magggggieeeee over here!! (Maggie is my roommate.)

The Blue Lounge Chair

I squealed in delight when I saw this lounge chair and was instantly tempted to belly flop onto the chair until I realized there were strangers sitting on the other end. When I very cooly sat down, the chair was comfortable, but not as comfortable as it looked. Or rather, it would have been much more comfortable had it been socially acceptable to nap on the chair. Not much work will get done on these lounge chairs, though.

  • Comfort: 4
  • Location/View: 4
  • Functionality: 3

Total: 11/15

blue lounge
Paint me like one of your French girls.
blue lounge view
It’s the absolute worst when you’re posing like one of Jack’s French girls and strangers walk up the steps judging you.

The Green Booth

This booth seating is perfect for both eating and studying, and its cushioning allows you to stay there all day. In addition, its location is close to the food court yet far enough from heavy foot traffic, acting like a pseudo sanctuary in the bustling HUB. Lunch date? This lighting in this particular section is dimmed slightly if you want that oh-so-romantic environment.

  • Comfort: 3
  • Location/View: 4
  • Functionality: 5

Total: 12/15

dining seating
Your perfect little lunch date/studying spot.
dining seating view
Just waiting for BAE.

The Blue Booth

Once you sit in this booth, you’ll never want to leave. The cushioning is perfect for long studying hours or an extended meal. It’s backed up against a wall so that no one is looking over your shoulder, and you’re not bothered by passersby’s. An added plus, you still get the view of the steps for your people watching entertainment.

  • Comfort: 5
  • Location/View: 4
  • Functionality: 5

Total: 14/15 for the Rookie of the Year Award!!

blue comfy
“You like these seats too?”
blue comfy view
Maybe next time.

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About the Author

Yuka Narisako

Yuka legally immigrated to the United States via airplane in 1996 from the small island nation of Japan. Since then she has migrated throughout the country and now identifies herself as a senior majoring in Architectural Engineering. The Shandygaff is her Happy Place, though she was once kicked out of the establishment after breaking her shoe and screaming “I LOVE DAY DRINKING. I’M HAVING FUN.” Yuka is overly enthusiastic about life in general, but especially Ja Rule, Halloween, and the puffy black vest she purchased from the Gap. You can reach her at [email protected], or through Twitter @yukahontass.

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