Penn State To Mansplain Football To Women For 125 Dollars
When I first heard Penn State football is hosting a “Women’s Football Clinic,” I felt proud. I thought, ‘Awesome, our school will pioneer a camp for female football players. This is a step in the right direction.’
Intrigued, I kept reading. “The Penn State Women’s Football Clinic is designed to be an informative evening exploring aspects of the program and the game itself,” Penn State Athletics said in the press release. Yikes.
Based on this description, it seems Penn State Football folks thinks women need a night of James Franklin informing them about “aspects of the game.” Because watching the same exact games men watch, observing patterns, and forming analysis on our own just isn’t possible with our feeble woman-brains, right ladies?
There’s no way we actually get it. We’re obviously just there for the tailgate Instagrams and the cute players. Franklin and his crew are the knights in shining armor we damsels need. Thanks, James. I mean, seriously, if we claim to like football so much why can’t we name every single person who has ever played at Penn State? A bunch of fake fans we are. Luckily, for the small fee of $125, Penn State has the answer to our prayers.
With so many aspects of the game to explore and so many people with vaginas who simply can’t understand on our own, where will we start?
I can just see the powerpoints of James Franklin’s “motivational speech” now. Special teams: More than just dear to our hearts. Sacks: Not just the things dangling from men’s legs that you don’t have, therefore you are dumb! Wildcat: Kitties are cute and so is Saquon Barkley. Blocking: Not just what you do on Twitter.
I think I speak for majority of female Penn State sports fans when I say this: I’d love a “clinic” from Athletic Director Sandy Barbour about adversity women face in the sports world. And maybe this is even what James Franklin’s “clinic” is about, maybe it’s not just explaining football to women, but the vague description of the event does not imply otherwise. I don’t understand why she let something like this slide.
Penn State is perpetuating the notion that women don’t understand sports. Why couldn’t Athletics promote this as a “clinic” for all beginner sports fans who want to learn more? That’d be fine. The dinner and the tour seem cool enough, too. Just stop assuming women need your help and stop trying to charge us for it.
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About the Author
Penn State has the fourth-most expensive student ticket prices in the country.
Shoutout to Ticketmaster, for making what was already a stressful, frustrating, and anxiety-riddled process four times as long and ten times as confusing.
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