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Penn State Class Facebook Group Posts: Madlibs Style

Once you made that fateful decision during your senior year and chose to call Penn State home for the next four (or maybe five) years, one of the first things you probably did was join your new class Facebook group. It starts very innocently and you’re excited to read about all of your new classmates as they post little tidbits and fun facts about themselves. But within a couple months, you all travel to campus and the dynamic of the posts quickly shifts from personal introductions to I-need-your-help-in-some-way posts.

There are certain posts that seem to pop up every time you log in to Facebook. We streamlined the process for everyone so you won’t have to write (or have to read) another stereotypical Facebook Class of Whatever post again.

I Lost My ____

If anyone finds a/an (item that poster and probably 50 other people had when they went out but no longer have) please let me know!!! It’s (color) and (size) and was last seen at (frat/street name/dorm/classroom).*

*Optional additions:

It was my (important family member) and (he/she) will (punishment) me if I don’t get it back!

I’ll give you (some very small reward) if you return it!

Found Phone

I found this phone (outside or inside) frat with (description of case/items found in case), let me know if it’s yours!

**Insert picture of phone, front and back, with screen lit-up displaying various GroupMe/text messages the person probably doesn’t want posted on Facebook.

Found ID/License/Debit Card

If anyone knows (name of person on card who the poster could have looked up themselves), I found their (one of three above cards) outside (frat/restaurant/dorm/building on campus) please let them know I have it! If not I’m turning it into (closest building with lost and found/desk).

Need A Roommate

Hey guys so (choose one: my roommate dropped the lease/dropped out OR me and my four roommates leased a five person apartment) so I’m looking for someone to live with (me/us) in (apartment complex or dorm name) next year! Rent is (amount of money) and it’s super close to (cool downtown locations near aforementioned apartment complex/important campus buildings near aforementioned dorm). We’re all really (relatable character trait) and (adjective) to live with, message me for details! (@name of roommate 1, @name of roommate 2, etc.)

Subletting My Apartment

Hey guys so I live in (popular apartment complex OR random house on street around campus) and am going home for the summer. I am subletting (my room/apartment/house) from (day after you’re leaving during finals week) till (a couple days before fall classes start)It includes (said amenities) but please don’t touch (these of my belongings that I don’t want to take all the way home). The price is (amount of money a week or discounted prince for entire summer) but it’s negotiable!!

Need A Class That Is Full

If anyone in (class) (section) with (professor) at (time) on (days of week) could please please please drop it so I can get in I will literally give you (expensive item/large sum of money/”anything”).

~Or, in a less likely case~

Can the (number higher than 10) people in (class) (section) with (professor) at (time) on (days of week) please drop the class I need it I will literally give you (expensive item/large sum of money/”anything”).

Need Survey Participation For A Class

I’m in (class) and I had to create (very random type of survey) for a project and I would really appreciate it if everyone could take (some small amount of time) to complete it, it would literally help me out so much thank you!

Possible, but unlikely, addition: If you complete it you will be entered to win a (dollar amount) gift card to (local business) so please do it!

Selling Concert Tickets

I am selling my (quantity) of (concert) ticket(s) for (date of concert). I bought the ticket(s) before I realized I had (random personal event that definitely did not need to be shared) and now I can’t go :( Seat(s) are (decent/nosebleed/floor) and i’m selling it/them cheap at only (price) because I just want to get rid of it/them!!!

***

If you can complete your college experience without posting or responding to at least one of these, you are part of a rare group. From finding roommates to claiming lost items, these Class of Whatever groups can sometimes be very useful. Other times, you can just log on when you need a good laugh.

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About the Author

Janelle Rothacker

Currently a senior studying Kinesiology, Janelle is proud to call upstate NY (the real part, not the 30 minutes north of the city part) home. She's an avid runner and enjoys everything and anything sports. She also has a love of pancakes, avoids the HUB like the plague during the in between classes rush, and can quote the majority of Friends episodes from memory. If you want to hear all the embarrassing things she does daily, or want to contact her, follow her on twitter at @janellerothack or email her at [email protected].

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