The Nittany Lion is the symbol of Penn State’s best, and is therefore the perfect addition to any university-themed apparel.

College Ave. retail racks are stuffed with clothes sporting the famous logo, and bins overflow with stuffed animals that portray this icon. However, just because you can make something look almost like the Nittany Lion does NOT mean you should.

In the spirit of the iconic “We’re” meme and “Pen Stat” t-shirts, here’s a look at a few items that maybe should have stayed in the design studio and off downtown shelves.

Nittany Lion Pillow Pet

It’s a pillow. It’s a low-maintenance pet. It’s a pillow pet. More specifically, this is a Nittany Lion pillow pet that can be found at most downtown stores. This bad boy can fold from cuddly stuffed animal to a supportive pillow in just seconds.

I must admit that I am a proud owner of this creation, but I have seen the Nittany Lion before and he does NOT look like this. To me, this product looks more like an angry beaver, which I suppose fits with Beaver Stadium, but still misses the mark. I’m still giving it points for comfort, though. 

What animal it looks more like: An angry beaver

Penn State “Squishable”

I found this little guy in the stuffed animal bin at McLanahan’s. It’s called a “squishable.” While, yes, it is VERY squishable, I am not getting the fierce Nittany Lion vibes from this one. In fact, this has more of an Ohio State Buckeye roundness. Gross.

What animal it looks more like: The pigs in Angry Birds

Wireless Bluetooth Speaker 

As I soon as I saw this speaker, I knew THIS was what I was looking for. This Nittany Lion bluetooth speaker resides front and center on the countertop at McLanahan’s — the perfect spot for a beady-eyed icon. The scarf, mouth, and nose are a pretty good imitation of the Nittany Lion. The eyes? Not so much. They’re staring deep into your soul and making you question your music choices. 

What animal it looks more like: An owl tripping on some illicit substance

Penn State Head Cover

Looking for a way to sike out your opponent next time you take the green? Boy, do I have an idea for you. This crooked, squashed head cover looks to just not be having a good day. He was also the last one left (tear) on the shelf.

What animal it looks more like: A kangaroo that just got punched in the face

Nittany Lion Hat

This fun hat can be found in the children’s section of Family Clothesline. Why would you want this for your child? I’m not sure, but I must add that it does have a velcro strap so you can never lose it.

Penn State apparel is the best type of apparel and the Nittany Lion is the best type of lion. However, some things are better left alone or apart.

What animal it looks more like: A cartoon bear staring deep into your soul