During our 3 a.m delirium, I decided to peruse THON’s spectator guide. That, my friends, is when I came across the “At-Home Minute-To-Win-It Games” on page 10. So, with nothing better to do with my time, I decided to have some fun and test my skills out.

It took a lot of pure athletic ability and mental fortitude to achieve what you’re about to see. So…enjoy.

Cotton Ball Scoop

The point of this game is to scoop ten cotton balls into a centrally located bowl while blindfolded in the one-minute. I used a gaiter mask around my eyes as a blindfold and proceeded to look like an idiot in my kitchen.

After one minute of searching for the all elusive cotton balls, I felt like I had succeeded in my mission by putting all 10 cotton balls into the bowl. To my surprise, when I removed the blindfold, I had only successfully put four of the 10 cotton balls into the bowl. Damn.

I felt dejected, head in my hands, and thought to myself, “Maybe I should give up.” I knew, though, that I had to continue my quest for the blog.

Tallest Tower

The objective of this game was to find any type of cereal or coins laying around and build the largest tower I could in a minute. For an extra challenge, I put my hand behind my back. I was determined to right the wrongs from my previous experience, rise through the ashes, and avenge my previous failure.

What occurred was the choke job of the century. I’m talking about running the ball of fourth and five-type choke job. I had a good tower going, one that could rival the Empire State Building, before it all collapsed with 15 seconds left of the clock.

In the final 15 seconds, I put together the best tower I could but to no avail. I failed yet again and had a small tower that summed up the failure that the night was becoming.

I knew I had one more chance to make the blog proud.

Cookie Face

The last game was a classic. The objective of this game was to put a cookie on your forehead and move it down to your mouth without using your hands. As this was a race, I solicited the help of my friend Lexi to take part in this epic race. We also needed to substitute a cookie for a graham cracker because I had no cookies. Sad!

The race lived up to the hype. It was a back and forth affair with both competitors inching closer and closer to the final goal. Unluckily for me, my cracker decided to fall off my head and shatter on the floor. As I reached for another, Lexi was able to get the cracker in her mouth and seal the win.

Another game, another loss.

So, I went 0-3 on the night. I had a lot of fun and killed off some time on my overnight shift, but I knew I failed. I let the blog down, and that is something that can not and will not happen again.

I will be back next year, and I will be victorious.