If you’ve ever wanted to live in a house with a constantly sticky floor, now’s your chance. 328 E. Fairmount Ave., clearly a former frat house, has been listed on Penn State’s Off-Campus Student Support website as a “Private Room in a Historic Mansion Rental.”

As a historic mansion indeed, who knows what’s gone on behind those walls?

This place has it all, folks. You and up to 15 other residents (no girls allowed, however!) can live in frat boy paradise without needing to go through recruitment (and all that that entails) or pledging. With 10 bedrooms, five bathrooms, and a gym, who could pass this up?

The listing advertises “great bedrooms” with plenty of light and closet space because it’s crucial that brothers Chad and Tyler have storage for their cutoff tanks. 

Speaking of cutoff tanks, there’s no better place to wear them than the house’s gym.

Look at that state-of-the-art facility! There are weights to really work on getting those massive biceps, weights to tone those biceps, and more weights, so you can really get a strong and well-rounded workout in. Seriously, who needs leg day anyway? But don’t worry, there’s also a punching bag in case your neighbors get on your nerves and a wall of floor-to-ceiling mirrors so you can really admire your form.

After that intense workout, you can shower in the totally-not-creepy bathrooms.

This is the bathroom of kings. Here, you can take a nice, long, relaxing shower after your exhausting day of playing beer pong. You’ve earned it, king! This is the only picture of the bathroom on the listing, so one can only hope that there are actually toilets.

After that shower, venture on down through one of the totally-not-ominous hallways to meet your brothers for some relaxation time.

Look how welcoming the living room is!

Finally, finish off your day in the large living room. Leather couches and a fireplace (with what looks like crumpled cans in the fireplace?) ought to lead to some cozy nights with the brothers in the winters. Don’t worry about the dim lighting — it just adds to the ambiance.