Apply To Be Onward State Stud Tobey Prime’s Valentine
Are you a single lady who loves Pittsburgh sports, pugs, and dancing? Well, you might’ve just stumbled into the right place. Onward State has the answer to your Valentine’s Day prayers.
We introduce to you Tobey Prime. Mr. Prime (what a cool name!) is a junior studying broadcast journalism. Affectionately referred to by our staff as “El Diablo,” he hails from Lancaster, Pa., and wants you to know that he is close with the Amish. Tobey would also like to add that he spent his whole life going to Catholic school and has a history of dressing up well.
This Valentine’s Day, he’s looking for someone who wants to hike Mount Nittany, cook Sunday dinner meals, and sing love songs off-key in just the right way.
Want to learn more about this Prime Valentine’s Day candidate? Here’s some more info:
Name: Tobey Michael Prime
Age: 20
Height: 5’11”
Likes: Mac Miller, Michael Bublé, Pittsburgh sports, pugs, binge-watching “Survivor,” Wii Sports, dancing, and walking around campus
Dislikes: Michigan (willing to make exceptions), people who chew with their mouth open, sore throats, and cats
Fun Fact: Tobey permed his hair twice during high school. Although very stylish, he found no success in the romance department.
Do you think Tobey is the man of your dreams? Apply below!
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