Sandy Barbour Grants Sean Clifford ‘Lifetime Eligibility’ In Final Move As Athletic Director
Editor’s note: This story is part of Onward State’s April Fools’ Day series. It is satirical, meant for entertainment, and not to be taken literally. Any quotes were made up for the purpose of this post.
Step aside, Christian Veilleux and Drew Allar. Sean Clifford isn’t going anywhere just yet.
On Friday, Penn State Vice President for Intercollegiate Athletics Sandy Barbour awarded Sean Clifford the university’s newly implemented Lifetime Achievement Award for devoting nearly six years of service to the Nittany Lions’ football program.
With the distinction, Clifford will be granted “lifetime eligibility” with Penn State football, allowing him to suit up in the blue and white as long as he can. The Ohio native, who will be 24 in July and is entering his sixth year of eligibility, could attempt to mirror Tom Brady’s mold by making an effort to compete on the gridiron well into his mid-40s.
“Today is a great day to be a Nittany Lion,” Barbour said following the honor’s ceremonial press conference. “Sean has displayed nothing but integrity during his time in Happy Valley, and I’m looking forward to seeing his tradition of excellence continue in Beaver Stadium long after I’m retired.”
In response to the unprecedented move, many are wondering how Clifford will be able to sustain his current lifestyle without ever attempting to enter a professional setting. However, with the support of lucrative NIL deals in Lion Tutors, Are You Hungry?, and Clifford Bros Training, the veteran gunslinger isn’t worried about ever leaving the confines of State College.
“Penn State has often been referred to as ‘football heaven,’ and as far as I’m concerned, there’s not another pure-play football guy out there to better represent this place than me,” Clifford told Onward State. “This is my program, and I’m happy that I’ll have countless opportunities to lead this school back into its glory days.”
In September, Clifford will likely begin his fourth year as the starting quarterback with 7,839 passing yards on 607 completions, including seven games with over 300 yards through the air. While the gritty passer will likely break every Penn State quarterback record simply due to sheer volume after his sixth campaign, he’s preparing every day reach one milestone — 100 games played in a Penn State uniform.
“Although I won’t hit it the 100-game mark next year or even the year after that, it will happen,” Clifford said. “Just like LeBron said when he first arrived in Miami, ‘not five, not six, not seven.’ Instead of referring to the championships he never won, he was actually talking about the years I’d be manning the backfield at Penn State. I’m here for the long haul.”
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