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OS Reviews: Willard Building Vending Machine Sandwiches

What do most vending machines have in common? You might say candy, water, or even soda and energy drinks. These days, the Willard Building is going above and beyond by adding sandwiches into the mix.

That’s right. Vending machines inside the building’s lobby offer sandwiches for students trying to get a quick bite to eat in between classes, or perhaps those searching for something to munch on while listening to a Willard Preacher sermon.

Trying prepackaged sandwiches like these isn’t for the faint of heart. Luckily, you don’t need to. We sent three brave staffers over to Willard this week to see what all the fuss was about.

Tobey Prime: Meatball Sub

Boy, was I nervous for this one. I am a big meatball fan, but the fact that this sub was chilling in a refrigerated vending machine just didn’t sit right with me.

As I pulled the sub out of the bag, I could already feel my stomach turn. The meatballs were ice-cold, the cheese was just placed on, and the sub was already ripped in half. It looked more miserable than I was, and that was surprising.

As I took my first bite, I felt an immediate shock in my tooth from the cold meatballs, sort of like when you eat ice cream that is just too cold. I was able to muster up the courage to eat only three bites before I had to put it aside. After about five minutes, my stomach did not feel good at all. I probably should’ve warmed it up, but Willard does not have a microwave, and it didn’t mention anything about heating it up on the label. I would not recommend anyone eat this sub.

The only positive thing I would say about this is that it has 33 grams of protein, which is just absurd. Also, the bread is solid.

Charles Reinert: Turkey Hoagie

 You know what? This honestly wasn’t that bad.

Would I go out of my way to eat it? Absolutely not. But considering this thing was in a vending machine, it wasn’t horrible. If I were super hungry and had no access to other food for some reason, I would definitely eat this. The turkey wasn’t bad, and neither was the cheese. It came with mayo, but I chose not to put it on.

If I had to rate this, I’d probably give it a pretty solid 6/10. That’s a passing grade!

Tobey Prime: Club Hoagie

The club hoagie was quite a surprise. It consisted of ham, turkey, roast beef, provolone, a packet of Italian dressing, and a mayo packet. As a general fan of meats, I was excited to give this a go.

After spreading the Italian dressing and mayo, I took my first bite and was actually satisfied. Although it came straight from a vending machine, this sub wasn’t too bad at all. However, how hard is it to mess up a bunch of deli meats?

Regardless, this was much better than the meatball sub, and I would actually recommend this to a friend, but only if they were absolutely starving. For $5 and 38 grams of protein, this sub will get you through your mid-day hunger and leave your stomach satisfied.

Adam Babetski: Chicken Salad Sandwich

I don’t think I’ve ever looked at a chicken salad sandwich and felt fear before.

It was every bit as bad as it looks. As I sank my teeth into the soggy mess, I encountered the worst part of all: the unusually sweet celery. For future reference, it’s probably not a great idea to buy a sandwich from a vending machine. If I get food poisoning tonight, I know what to thank.


Would you give the Willard vending machine sandwiches a try? Probably not, so it’s a good thing we tried them for you.

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About the Author

Staff

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