Onward State Managing Editor and now professional competitive eater Gabe “Glizzy Gobbler” Angieri has qualified for the 2023 Nathan’s Famous Hot Dog Eating Contest.

After State College Spikes Director of Communications Joe Putnam called out Onward State via Twitter to once again participate in the Dollar Dog Per Inning Challenge, like Michael Jordan, Angieri took that challenge personally and vowed to defeat the challenge after coming up short 1.5 dogs short the week prior.

Not only was he going to eat nine dogs before the night was finished, but he also challenged himself to do it all in one hour. During the game, Angieri took down eight dogs after the first inning.

After grabbing his ninth dog, he destroyed his ninth and final glizzy to achieve his goal and defeat the challenge once and for all.

After showing what he was capable of, the 21-year-old received an invitation to this year’s event. The 5’9″ senior will now be taking his talents to Coney Island this 4th of July to compete in this year’s Nathan’s Famous Hot Dog Eating Contest.

Angieri will go up against some of the greatest competitive eaters from around the world. The competitors include Eric “Badlands” Booker, Geoffrey Esper, and of course the reigning defending undisputed champion of the world, Joey “Jaws” Chestnut.

The Lindenhurst native will have his work cut up for him this summer, as he has now entered the big leagues in competitive eating. The training itself will be some of the worst pain anyone has gone through, but to reach the end goal of hoisting the Mustard Belt, it will be all worth it.

No matter what happens this Independence Day, everyone will forever remember what Angieri accomplished during Dollar Dog Night.

Editor’s note: This story is part of Onward State’s April Fools’ Day series. It is satirical, meant for entertainment, and not to be taken literally. Any quotes were made up for the purpose of this post.