Staff Picks: Penn State Hills We’d Die On
According to Grammarist, the hill you will die on “is believed to have originated in the military context, signifying a battle, typically fought on a hill (the high ground being strategically advantageous), that a soldier is willing to die for due to its significant importance.”
It appears that, here at Onward State, we have some soldiers on staff with some hills that we’d die on.
Penn State is quite a passionate group of people. “We Are!,” of course, but we also disagree on a lot. Everyone has their opinions about everything. However, it seems most people have that one Penn State opinion they hold most dear. The one stance that they refuse to hear objections for. The one belief that they will fight anyone about, at any time. Most Penn Staters have that one PSU-related hill they’ll die on.
Our staffers are no different, so here are some Penn State hills that our staffers say they’ll die on.
Alex Smith: Beau Pribula Deserves A Shot
Our offense wasn’t producing anything against Michigan and Ohio State, so why not put him in? He can run a lot better than Drew Allar, too. I think Beau Pribula could prove himself and potentially be a man for the job.
Marie Moyer: Unrenovated Dorms Humble You (In A Good Way)
Time and time again, I stand by the fact that students who lived in unrenovated dorms during their freshman year of college are overall better people than those spoiled by the renovated halls. I understand this sounds similar to the elderly going, “We had it hard so you do too.” But hear me out…
The poor conditions set you up with low standards, perfect for the real world. When my bright-eyed, bushy-tailed, kind of spoiled (still am) first-year self got slapped in the face with the less-than-stellar amenities of fifth floor Beaver in Pollock Halls, I was pretty excited. When I moved into my new apartment in my third year, I was just excited to sleep in a full bed, own a dishwasher, and walk on fake wooden floors that didn’t remind me of the linoleum tiles of a middle school.
While cinderblock walls and mothball-smelling closets are far from luxurious, I would have never traded my living space for some fancy East Hall dorm because it made me who I am.
Mikey DeAngelis: Penn State Hoops Should Play At Rec Hall Full-Time
There’s nothing like a college basketball game in a crowded arena with cheers and chants bouncing off the walls. There’s a reason Penn State’s annual game at The Palestra is so electric. Rec Hall has the potential to be similar.
Rec Hall is very similar architecturally to The Palestra and many other historical college basketball arenas. Penn State basketball struggled to even fill the bottom bowl of the Bryce Jordan Center, but it would regularly pack Rec Hall, and it would be electric.
Ally Eaton: Noon Games Should Be Illegal
Throughout the past football season, students, fans, and alumni alike have been plagued with the disease I’d like to call noon games. Noon kickoff games, in my opinion, are the worst type of games. They prompt a wake-up call at an ungodly hour, with many students still recovering from the night before. Everyone stumbles out to the tailgate lots, just to make it into the game half asleep. The energy does nothing to help encourage our team and many spectators leave the game feeling defeated and put on a brave face to make it back out for another round of tailgating. By the conclusion of this round, you’re tired, hungry, and just want to go to bed — but it’s only 7 p.m.
Night games in Beaver Stadium are something I wasn’t prepared for in my experience as a freshman, but I will die on the hill that they outrank any other kickoff time. Students are more excited, no one is rushed throughout the day, and when the game wraps up, no one has any other expectations for you except to bask in another glorious Nittany Lion win.
Sarah Lynn DeCarlo: Pollock Is Better Than East
Yes, East renovated has beautiful dorms, common rooms, and bathrooms, but I️ will always defend Pollock. I️ was lucky enough to have an air conditioner in my room freshman year which made the summer and spring slightly more bearable. Pollock has a better location relative to the downtown area, and you learn how to share a gross bathroom — a shittier dorm builds character. I️ know that phrase has been beaten like a dead horse, but it’s true. Never be upset about Pollock, it makes for great character development.
Aidan Conrad: Monte Carlo’s Wings & Pizza Is The Best Late-Night Food Spot
Yes, I may be saying this because Monte Carlo’s is a one-minute walk from my house, but it doesn’t change the fact that the menu is far more than wings and pizza. Although those two items are great, I love getting its super Italian sub, Monte Carlo cheesesteak, and sometimes its buffalo fries. It’s also nice to stop in and say hi to Mo from time to time.
Jamie Lynch: Penn State Deserved A Spot In The 2016 CFP
I typically don’t like to dwell on the past, but when it comes to a Penn State hill I would die on, nothing strikes a nerve quite like the playoff committee’s decision on the final four teams in the 2016 season.
The format of the playoff was designed to value conference titles, take into account the strength of schedule, and allow for teams to overcome early setbacks. Penn State won the Big Ten East. It beat No. 2 Ohio State. It was the conference champion in the most difficult conference in college football. It was on a nine-game winning streak that included two top-10 wins. The Lions were the hottest team in the sport by far, and they simply wouldn’t lose.
Yet, the Buckeyes got selected ahead of the Nittany Lions, even though the head-to-head result was in Penn State’s favor. Sure, Penn State already had two early-season losses (screw you, Pitt), which was ultimately the reason why it missed out on the CFP. But if there was ever a time when the committee should’ve selected a two-loss team, it was 2016.
Perhaps I feel this way because I was in attendance for the miracle comeback against Wisconsin. Or maybe I hold a grudge because Ohio State would go on to be demolished by Clemson 31-0. Whatever the case, I firmly believe the Nittany Lions should’ve earned a bid, and I stand by that claim today.
Joe Lister: The HUB Is Overrated
Say what you will, but the HUB, frankly, sucks. I’m not immune to spending some time in the HUB myself, as are most Penn State students, but it’s just not anything worth writing home about. It’s good for getting lunch or having space to do emergency work, but there’s never any reason to spend more than an hour in there each week, and even that’s a lot. There are few spaces to charge your computer if you want to do work, there are never any open seats to do the aforementioned work, and that place is grimy. Go hang out at the library or something.
Michael Siroty: The Library Sucks
Fred Lewis Pattee and Joe Paterno, this isn’t a shot at either of you. However, I strongly dislike the library named after you guys. It’s too serious, too crowded, and too quiet. I understand some people work better in quiet places, but like, c’mon, it’s scary silent. Speaking of scary, don’t even get me started on the stacks. It’s virtually impossible to find a book, and I’m genuinely worried for my safety when I’m there.
I’d rather get my homework and studying done just about anywhere else on campus if it means I don’t have to go to the library.
Nolan Wick: Liam Souliere Is A Great Goaltender
This is inspired by several recent arguments with two of my roommates who think Penn State’s starting netminder isn’t good at his job. They couldn’t be more wrong, as Liam Souliere consistently keeps the team in games and has turned in several stellar performances, including in the postseason. There’s a reason he’s been on watchlists for awards — he’s a stud. Anyone who says otherwise doesn’t know puck.
Ericka Apolskis: Don’t Buy Football Tickets Just To Sell Them
Like many others, I unfortunately didn’t win the great Ticketmaster war in July. It took me a while to accept that I would have to buy a ticket for every game, but after hearing everyone talk about it being so easy to find a ticket, I felt OK. However, what no one tells you is that you’ll have to drop a lot of money to do so. I got lucky with most of my ticket prices, except for almost spending double what the season ticket price total was for my White Out ticket, but I don’t want to talk about it.
Seeing students sell every one of their tickets infuriates me. The profit they make is insane but that’s beside the point. Don’t buy tickets just to sell them. Also, there should be some kind of quiz to get a ticket because of the number of people I talked to who don’t even like football and easily got tickets while I was screaming at my computer at six in the morning trying to get my Ticketmaster to load. I rest my case.
Ashley Connington: Being A Frat Groupie Is Elite
Frat hopping is overrated. What’s the point of switching from one sweaty basement for another to walk in the cold and just get turned away at the door because they’re at capacity? Being a groupie (or fanatic, enjoyer, whatever you wish to call it) is where it’s at. Explore a few places and stick with your favorite, your life will change.
I found mine last year, and I’m there 90% of the time without fail. It’s better to have so much fun in one place than to try to cross every place off a list and just stand there. You’ll save lots of time not having to wonder where you’ll go, and chances are, you won’t even need texts because they’re used to you at the door. Plus, becoming friends with the brothers will mean they let you skip lines, catch you when you almost wipe out on the floor, and walk you home without fail. Thank you Far Sig for letting me be your groupie, I love you.
Keeley Lamm: Erica Dambach Is The Goat
Guys, it was always Penn State women’s soccer.
The badass team that plays at the corner of Park Avenue and University Drive is often forgotten among the “greats” of Penn State Athletics. Get a grip.
The Nittany Lions have a National Championship, five College Cup appearances, 29 NCAA Tournament appearances, 20 Big Ten regular-season titles, and nine Big Ten Tournament titles to their name. Many of those accolades are thanks to head coach Erica Dambach, who has led the team for 17 seasons. While, selfishly, I wanted Dambach to remain in Happy Valley, she was always my choice for the United States Women’s National Team’s head coaching vacancy. She’s among the greats of women’s college soccer and isn’t slowing down.
Give her a raise.
Rico Gore: Mount Nittany
I think I might’ve misunderstood the assignment.
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About the Author
“It feels good to just kind of see the success building and coming. But we’re nowhere near where we want to be, nowhere near satisfied yet.”
Sometimes, it’s hard to recognize just how good something is when you’re in the thick of it, so we broke down just how insane the Nittany Lions’ dominance is.
“September 7, 2024 can’t come soon enough.”