As the fall semester winds down and we inch closer and closer to finals, it’s simply getting harder to find the motivation to go to class.

For some, it’s pretty much impossible to make it to these last two weeks of class. Sometimes, you just need the day off, so we brainstormed a few Penn State-themed excuses to skip class while remaining true to Dear Old State.

“I Got Hit By A CATA Bus”

Legends have spread from dorm to dorm in East Halls that if you get hit by a CATA bus, the remainder of your tuition is free.

Despite its questionable legitimacy, it’s a damn good get-out-of-class-free card. CATA buses run at nearly all hours, so if you’re looking for a last-minute excuse, why not try this out? 

Now, if you didn’t actually get hit by a bus, this may not be the best excuse because you’re professor might unfold your white lie. With that being said, you would have to be a pretty cold-hearted professor to question a student who claims they’ve suffered life-altering injuries. We don’t recommend trying this, but if you do, let us know how it goes. 

“I Got Food Poisoning From A Chicken Basket”

This is probably my favorite excuse that I may or may not have used before. The chicken basket is probably the best part of many students’ time at Penn State. There’s simply nothing like a warm chicken basket on a freezing cold Saturday in Beaver Stadium. Although always delicious, there are times that the Sunday after a football game may be a regretful one due to a few too many chicken tenders with honey mustard. 

I guarantee every professor fully understands the pain of food poisoning, so if you give them a Penn State football-related food poisoning excuse, then they’ll let you off the hook. 

“I’m Running A Bake Sale For THON”

I’m not sure how many Penn State students have used this excuse in the past, but I’m definitely one of them. If you walk down College Avenue on any random day, there is a great chance you’ll run into one or even a few organizations leading a bake sale to raise money for THON. 

Every professor understands the importance of THON and will absolutely give you a pass from class if this is your honest excuse. However, this is a pretty messed up thing to lie about, so I definitely don’t recommend doing so. I don’t think any faculty member would be lenient if they learned a student was lying about anything THON-related. But, hey, it is a great cause, so why not use this excuse?

“I’m Watching The 2016 Penn State-Ohio State Football Game”

You’re going to have to wait for the perfect professor if you want to use this excuse in any form. If I were your professor, I would most likely give you an A in the class and let you skip the final. Sadly, I am not your professor, and you’ll probably fail the class if you try this. Then again, if you’re going to skip class, it better be to rewatch arguably the best game in Penn State football’s history. 

I can’t say that I’ve ever skipped class for a replay of a football game, but I’ve definitely watched this replay in class. My best advice is to just go to class, get the credit for attendance, turn the volume on your computer down, and enjoy watching Trace McSorley and Saquon Barkley rip Urban Meyer’s heart out. It really is a beautiful thing. 

“I’m Listening To Podward State”

Every professor at Penn State will understand this excuse for skipping class. All you say in your email is “Sorry, professor, I’m listening to absolute gold right now,” and they’ll know what you mean. 

Podward State has to be the best way to spend your time. It definitely beats sitting in math class, I promise.