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PSU Fans: No Need To Announce JoePa’s Successor

88% of respondents in a poll conducted by the Examiner indicated that the University should not name a successor to replace head coach Joe Paterno when he retires.

If I were to speculate on the reasoning behind the results, it’s because most fans believe either that it’s obviously going to be defensive coordinator Tom Bradley, or Paterno will be able to coach forever by grafting his head to a robot body.

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About the Author

Mark

Mark McColey is a Senior majoring in Advertising and Labor-Employment relations. Among his loves are Penn State Football, The Steelers, The Penguins, The Simpsons, Tina Fey, and Arrested Development.

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Gorman Abruptly Resigns

Head coach of the men’s soccer program Barry Gorman unexpectedly announced his resignation Monday. He leaves a legacy of 22 years of coaching and three Big Ten titles in his wake. Citing “personal reasons,” he has left the team to a nation-wide search for his successor.

“We expected Gorman to be there,” [rising Senior and Co-Captain Andres] Casais said of next season. “He was a father figure to us.”



Oof, that can’t feel good. The move isn’t completely out of the blue, as Gorman was periodically absent during the past few weeks without notice. But from all accounts, his intention to resign was only revealed yesterday. On the abandonment scale, this registers just slightly above “going to the store for some cigarettes and never coming back.”

EVERYBODY PANIC: Battle Submits For NBA Draft

Twisted Humor Comedy Tour to Visit Alumni Hall

Alumni, What State College Bar/Restaurant Would You Bring Back Downtown?

Do you yearn for cigarette ash-dusted grilled cheeses from “quintessential shithole” Grillers? Or a night out at G-Man with your old frat bros? Or have evenings of drinking felt incomplete ever since Canyon moved across Beaver and got rid of its sticky blue picnic tables?

Cael Sanderson Among This Year’s Penn State Honorary Alumni Award Recipients

Five individuals who are not Penn State graduates but who have worked for the betterment of the university have been named this year’s Honorary Alumni Award recipients.

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