PSU Boombox Guy Declares “Boombox Wednesdays”
Get ready, get set, and mark your calendars!
If you don’t know who this iconic Penn State individual is, you might want to prioritize your lives. You may have spotted him strutting his stuff on College Ave, or if you really lucky, he might have even stumbled his way into your apartment party. Either way, he has all bounced into our lives and our hearts by wearing sunglasses at night and carrying an 80’s-esque boombox on his shoulder providing tunes for all that pass.
I actually had the honor of meeting PSU Boombox Guy last Thursday night in the line for Indigo. After Instagramming a series of photographs with him, I thought it might be important to get the inside scoop on what will make these Boombox Wednesdays so special to get us all over the dreaded middle of the week hump.
Boombox Guy, whose birth name is Brian Cronaeur, learned that another Boombox Guy JJ at the University of South Carolina designated his own Boombox Day for Thursdays. In order to step up to the plate, Boombox Guy made the crucial decision to declare Wednesday as Penn State’s Boombox Day. Although he doesn’t have classes on Friday for the fifth semester in a row, he chose Wednesday as his official day. Cronaeur will be walking around the State College streets for a bit on Wednesdays to bring music to our ears and glorious dance moves to our eyes.
When asked what the purpose of this weekly phenomenon is for, Cronauer responded, “I’ll just put smiles on everyone’s faces and make them realize that seeing me on Beaver Avenue is only two days away.”
Boombox Guy, who usually prances and frolics around on weekends, is now giving up some precious leisure time to bring us joy during the week! Christmas came early this year guys.
Now, I like a good rage on the way to Thomas or Willard more than the average college student, but he promises me that he will find daytime appropriate for mellow jams. He stated that less people have the desire to party on the way to class, and that is probably the main reason we dropped to #11 in the party rankings. (Is this factual? I’d like to see some graphs).
Now, maybe we should all pitch in and bring him a treat since he will be bringing us his joy not only on weekends, but also on my least favorite day of all. His favorite milkshake flavor is the classic chocolate, but he can always go for a cookies n’ cream when he is feeling weird.
For all those curious George’s out there (me), Brian has a total of four boom boxes, but only two that he considers nice. One he purchased from eBay, and the other from a military priest in Hershey on Craigslist.
Play that funky music white boy.
Be sure to look for Boombox Guy bumpin’ on the streets every Wednesday, follow his tweets @PSUBoomBoxGuy, or purchase an official Boombox Guy t-shirt for a bargain $10 if you really want to attract the ladies.
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About the Author
My own personal hell will include shirtless people yelling “Ski U Mah!” and “M-I-N-N-E-S-O-T-A, Minnesota! Minnesota!” in my ears until they bleed.
Just let all of the sad feelings wash over you on this Monday morning.
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