The Official Penn State vs. Boston College Drinking Game

Cameron Hart

The worst thing about away games is just that: They’re away. While we’re expecting Yankee Stadium to be filled with fans donning the Nittany Lions’ Blue and White, nothing compares to a game in Beaver Stadium, and it’s always a little less fun when we have to watch the game on TV instead of with 107,000 of our friends.

Regardless, we here at Onward State plan to make the most out of our Saturday. With that in mind, here is the drinking game we have created for the final game of the year — today’s Pinstripe Bowl matchup against Boston College:

If you’re going to the game, drink because you have to enter the Bronx.

If Jeter shows up, stand on your chair, scream “O CAPTAIN MY CAPTAIN!” and take a drink.

Any time Penn State lines up in the Wildcat formation, take a drink.

If the announcer tries to be funny and makes baseball references (touchdown as a “home run”, low scoring game as a “baseball score”), take a drink.

Every time the New York City skyline appears on the screen, drink.

Waterfall any time a graphic showing Penn State’s offensive stats appears on screen.

If Rob Bolden — or any other highlight from the TicketCity Bowl — comes on screen, chug your drink.

If Mike Hull makes a tackle, drink. Everyone dies. (Editor’s note: Don’t actually do this.)

Every time Christian Hackenberg is sacked, shed a single tear and drink.

Drink for 2.98 seconds if anyone mentions that the sanctions were dropped…

And drink for 4.09 seconds if anyone mentions that Joe Paterno’s wins were not reinstated. Be sure to pour one out for Joe, too.

If Boston College scores a touchdown, chug your drink.

If Penn State loses, drink whatever you have left. If Penn State wins, drink whatever you have left.

Enjoy the game! And drink carefully, you bunch of drunks.

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About the Author

Alex Robinson

Alex Robinson was Onward State's Acting Managing Editor/Resident Old Man. He lived in Harrisburg almost his whole life, but he says he's from California -- where he was born -- because that's more fun. He loves cats and Chinese food, but only separately. He met both Ben Affleck and Kanye West within a half hour, so the three of them are basically best friends. If you want to hear his #scorching #hot #takes, you can follow him at @ARobinsonPSU or email him at [email protected]

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