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The Best State College Drunk Food Bracket: Crowning The Champion

The 1969 Miracle Mets. Jim Valvano’s 1983 NC State Wolfpack. Leicester City. The Miracle on Ice. Harry Truman.

Bradley’s Cheesesteaks…your 2018 Onward State Drunk Food Bracket champion.

The local eatery inserted its name among some of history’s most storied and inspiring underdogs when it completed the impossible: earning the status of home to State College’s best, greasiest, and guiltily palatable late-night food after dismantling heavily favored Gumby’s Pokey Stix.

Having upset Penn Kebab, Sheetz, Are U Hungry, Insomnia, and Gumby’s and earned more than 78 percent of votes in each round, Bradley’s had the ultimate Cinderella story deserving of its own ESPN 30 for 30.

It’s said that great players emerge in championships. You might as well call Bradley’s the Michael Jordan Zain Retherford of drunk food brackets. The sub shop had its most lopsided win of the tournament in the finals, earning 96 percent of votes against Gumby’s.

Attribute it to luck of the draw, seeding errors by the selection committee, or foul play, but the weekly overwhelming deficits show just how much folks love their cheesesteaks.

2018 has been a banner year for Philadelphia, with the Eagles winning the Super Bowl, Villanova cutting down the nets after winning the other March Madness, the 76ers winning a playoff game over the weekend, and now Bradley’s and its Philly-style sandwiches cementing their legacy as the single-greatest stop for a drunken, late-night bite.

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About the Author

Anthony Colucci

Anthony Colucci is Onward State’s managing editor, a preferred walk-on honors student, and a senior majoring in psychology and public relations. Despite being from the make-believe land of Central Jersey, he was never a Rutgers fan. If you ever want to know how good Saquon Barkley's ball security is, ask Anthony what happened when he tried to force a fumble at the Mifflin Streak. If you want to hear the story or are bored and want to share prequel memes, follow @_anthonycolucci on Twitter or email him at [email protected] All other requests and complaints should be directed to Onward State media contact emeritus Steve Connelly.


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