Penn State Football Players As Kens
After Taylor Swift took
Arrowhead Stadium Travis Kelce’s Mojo Dojo Casa House by storm Sunday, we couldn’t help but reminisce on our Happy Valley Kens blanking Iowa 31-0 in their Mojo Dojo Casa House Saturday.
So in true Barbie fashion, we brainstormed a few old and new Penn State football Kens that help make this Barbieland go round.
National Anthem Ken: Golden Israel-Achumba
This Ken has pipes.
Golden Israel-Achumba has been making a name for himself off of the football field singing “The Star-Spangled Banner.” He debuted his secret talent at the 2023 Blue-White Game and hasn’t looked back.
Redshirt junior offensive lineman Golden Israel-Achumba kicked off Beaver Stadium’s pregame festivities with a solo rendition of the national anthem. pic.twitter.com/9NMsWf0nOX— Onward Sports (@OnwardStSports) April 15, 2023
Twitter Ken: Adam Breneman
Our internet Ken. Former Penn State football tight end turned Twitter personality Adam Breneman is an easy pick for our chronically online Ken.
With his experience hosting the “Next Up with Adam Breneman” podcast and creating the NIL-driven sports media company Mercury, Breneman will ensure the Barbies’ mics are on and they’re making the best NIL decisions in Barbieland.
America’s Ken: Drew Allar
While we’ve known about Drew Allar since his Medina days, many around the country are just now finding out about Penn State’s beloved starting quarterback.
Allar’s always been Penn State’s Ken, but maybe now he’s becoming America’s Ken.
Grandpa Ken: Sean Clifford
Every Ken needs a Grandpa Ken, and where would America’s Ken be without his own? Sean Clifford, Penn State’s three-year starter from 2019 to 2022 and all-time leader in wins at quarterback, laid the gritty groundwork for America’s Ken to shine as brightly as he does.
Grandpa Ken, as a fellow Ohioan, bred America’s Ken for greatness in the Keystone State.
Walk-On Ken: Dom DeLuca
Everybody loves an underdog Ken.
Mayonnaise Ken: Will Levis
It’s not normal. It’s not right. But it’s uniquely Will Levis, our Mayonnaise Ken.
Will Levis has signed a LIFETIME deal with Hellman's Mayonnaise pic.twitter.com/vO5tSTPOFL— Bleacher Report (@BleacherReport) August 23, 2023
Australian Ken: Riley Thompson
You get it. Riley Thompson, a Melbourne, Australia, native, is our Oz Ken. Some could also make a case for Mustache Ken.
Physicist Ken: Olu Fashanu
Our “Academic Heisman” semifinalist is the clear choice for the brains of Barbieland.
Olu Fashanu was named a William V. Campbell Trophy semifinalist, meaning he’s rocking at least a 3.2 GPA, shows strong character and leadership off the field, and is a significant contributor on the field. This Ken does it all.
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About the Author
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