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Drunk, Sober, High: Solar Eclipse

The 2024 solar eclipse has come and gone, and it was an impressive sight to see albeit brief in Happy Valley. Therefore, we figured it would be the perfect opportunity for Onward State’s “Drunk, Sober, High” series to make its return.

Three staffers willingly got drunk, high, or remained sober for the solar sight. Below are their recollections of the historic occasion.

Drunk

I’d be lying if I said this eclipse matched expectations. We only got to see bits and pieces of it during the roughly two hours we were watching it, but I had a fun time hanging out with the friends who came with me.

As soon as our designated sober driver took us to our location to watch, I immediately got to work on the beer I brought with me. I downed one quickly as we threw a football around, and I soon began drinking even more as the anticipated time for the best chance to see the eclipse drew closer.

We eventually stopped throwing the ball around and started listening to Bob Marley on a speaker, making the vibes immaculate as I began to feel increasingly intoxicated. I was vibing and enjoying myself to the fullest while surrounded by my friends, a beer in my hand, and good music.

However, we never got to see the eclipse for more than a minute at a time, which was quite disappointing after significant buildup. It was cloudy and a little rainy, which checks out in Central Pennsylvania. After the peak viewing window didn’t reveal much, I decided it was time to head home. I was left drunk and disappointed, but I still had a great time hanging out with my friends and enjoyed seeing the eclipse when I could.

Sober

Overall, the solar eclipse was anything but exciting.

The friends who were there with me as I watched made this underwhelming event worth it. There were about eight of us gathered in the bed of my truck watching the sky as we listened to Bob Marley.

We were all frustrated with Mother Nature for letting us down (typical at Penn State) but being together allowed us to enjoy each other’s company. I was throwing the football around with a few guys on top of the parking garage before and after the eclipse. As we reached the point closest to totality, we all looked up straight into clouds with frustration and anger that the clouds were blocking the eclipse at the best viewing time for State College.

We all began making jokes such as the eclipse had “stage fright” along with other silly quips that voiced our frustration with the circumstances. I had a lot of fun with everyone getting to see the eclipse for about two minutes total. The eclipse was very upsetting, but the memories made with everyone while attempting to watch the eclipse will never be forgotten.

High

Despite the clouds making it hard to see the eclipse all the way through, I had a pretty eventful time watching the eclipse. Right after my last class of the day, I started ripping my cart while booking it to the parking garage to meet Drunk and Sober.

By the time I got there, it was around 2:30 p.m. — just under an hour before the peak of the eclipse viewing. Drunk was a few beers deep and just seemed happy to be there, and I was starting to feel pretty stoned.

Anticipation and vibes were pretty ~high~ as we waited with our crew of lads. However, a little before 3 p.m. tragedy struck: my pen battery died. While I was decently stoned, I needed to be balls to the walls high while watching or it wouldn’t have been as magical.

Luckily, some of our friends who met us there lived pretty close by and had a charger for it, so we made the game-time decision to hustle on over to charge my battery before the peak.

On the way, we got to see glimpses of the eclipse, giving of us even more motivation to haul ass and make it back on time, and we only had about 20 minutes to get there and back. Mind you, I was already pretty high at this point, so I was already a little distracted but even more determined.

By the time we got back, I had a charged pen and we had a good amount of time to spare before the eclipse was hitting closest to totality.

With a few more pen rips in me, my head was definitely in the clouds. As State College started to darken slightly, I swear everything just looked so magical. The clouds were such a bummer, but as time went on, we were able to see some of it at different points of the process. Most times when the clouds were out of the way, we didn’t even need the glasses to see.

All in all, between the vibes, the company, Bob Marley playing in the background, and being stoned, this eclipse was one for the books and the perfect way to spend my Monday afternoon.

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About the Author

Staff

Posts from the all-student staff of Onward State.

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