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Brainstorming Items To Put In A Penn State Time Capsule

Imagine this: The year is 2124.

Before Penn State can install holograms of Saquon Barkley and Joe Paterno in Beaver Stadium, it has to dig underground for the construction. While digging, the crew finds a box reading “Penn State Time Capsule: 2024,” and finds mementos that remind Penn Staters of the biggest things around 2024.

Here are some things we think should be memorialized and placed in a time capsule for those to enjoy in 100 years.

Champs Dollar Vodka Soda Cups

Who in their right mind doesn’t love a vodka soda for $1? If Champs ever chooses to end dollar vodka soda night, then it’s only fitting that a cup is placed in the time capsule to honor the event. However, there would need to be a Mio placed in the cup so the future Penn Staters don’t think we were psychotic for drinking plain dollar vodka sodas.

A Meatball Sub From McLanahan’s

Is there anything more perfect than McLanahan’s Meatball Mondays? Answer: No.

Sure, the sandwiches don’t have a shelf life of 100 years, but the infamous sub deal shall be known for centuries to come. It’s the perfect ratio of melted cheese and tomato sauce goodness that’s married together with the perfectly made meatballs and toasted bun.

A Taco Bell Baja Blast

Although it’s been four years since the downtown Taco Bell closed, the Taco Bell vigil will forever live in Penn State history. Even though the Taco Bell meat is questionable and could probably last for another hundred years, a Baja Blast is the heart and soul of Taco Bell, as was the Taco Bell downtown.

Zyns

It’s expected that something more innovative will be produced to get a quick nicotine fix, but something about a Zyn will forever be nostalgic. Whether it’s a tailgate or an 8 a.m. final, Zyns can be used in almost any situation. I’m sure in a hundred years when the time capsules popped open, the first person to crack open the Zyn’s will be hooked and bring them back for another hundred years.

The THON Zamboni

There’s nothing more painful than watching the Zamboni take its sweet old time to clean the floor throughout THON weekend. Hopefully, a more efficient tool will be invented in the next 100 years, and if so, the Zamboni will be a perfect representation of the grueling 46-hour dance marathon in all its glory.

The Willard Preachers Sweatshirt

The Willard Preacher isn’t only known for his preaching, but more so for his infamous blue jeans and red sweatshirt. If by some miracle we can peel the sweatshirt off him, it would need to be memorialized for future generations to learn about the historic Gary Cattell.

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About the Author

Maya Thiruselvam

Maya is a senior majoring in English from Deleware County, PA, and an associate editor for Onward State. She is a huge Phillies fan and thinks Citizens Bank Park should bring back Dollar Dog Night. When she's not talking to the Willard preacher you can find her rewatching episodes of Ted Lasso or The Office. To reach her, follow her on Instagram or Twitter: @maya_thiruselvam, or email her at [email protected].

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