JoePa Has Eye Surgery, Ditches Thick Lenses
It was reported yesterday that Head Football Coach Joe Paterno had eye surgery in Philadelphia after he had some difficulty reading. The procedure was a success, and Paterno no longer needs his iconic “coke-bottle” glasses. Instead of eschewing eyewear entirely, he will be wearing glasses with thinner lenses, as he “feels strange” without them. Given that he’s now wearing glasses he doesn’t absolutely need, it’s safe to conclude he’s only a scarf, a sleeve tattoo and a derisive comment about mainstream music away from being Hipster JoePa.
Your ad blocker is on.
Please choose an option below.
Purchase a Subscription!
About the Author
10 Questions With Onward State Managing Editor Joe Lister
Joe Lister was named Onward State’s 19th managing editor at its final all-staff meeting of the spring 2024 semester.
Penn State Baseball Walks Off Rutgers 7-6
After going down 3-0 early, the Nittany Lions rallied late to keep their postseason hopes alive.
Former Penn State Safety King Mack Commits To Alabama
Mack reportedly entered the portal on Thursday, May 2.
Gorman Abruptly Resigns
Head coach of the men’s soccer program Barry Gorman unexpectedly announced his resignation Monday. He leaves a legacy of 22 years of coaching and three Big Ten titles in his wake. Citing “personal reasons,” he has left the team to a nation-wide search for his successor.
“We expected Gorman to be there,” [rising Senior and Co-Captain Andres] Casais said of next season. “He was a father figure to us.”
Oof, that can’t feel good. The move isn’t completely out of the blue, as Gorman was periodically absent during the past few weeks without notice. But from all accounts, his intention to resign was only revealed yesterday. On the abandonment scale, this registers just slightly above “going to the store for some cigarettes and never coming back.”