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The Dick Diaries: Chronicles of The Penis Monologues

Captain James Tiberius Kirk, the Millennium Falcon, and Clark Kent. What do these have in common? They are names many members of the cast of the Penis Monologues called their johnsons (while standing in the aisles of  111 Forum in their boxers). Before you get curious, yes, I spent my Valentines eve sitting in 111 Forum listening to other students talk about their penises.

I will honestly say that I have never laughed at a play this hard. Full of dirty jokes, The Penis Monologues delivered a quick, hard shot of laughter right in the arm from the moment it started. All the various sketches revolved around various activities of the penis, whether it be about peeing after sex, masturbating (apparently JoePa screams “COME TO PENN STATE” at climax), and shaving your pubic hair. Some other topics covered:

  • Proper oral sex etiquette (for audience members who are heterosexual or homosexual)
  • Taboo masturbation techniques
  • How the penis would break during coitus, as well as the cure
  • STDs and how to get back at your friends that laugh at you if you have one
  • The feeling most men get when they have to wear condoms

It continued in this vein for the duration of the evening. Audience members were treated as props, which kept the entire feeling of the Monologues very personal. Many times the actors would banter with the audience and remind them that some situations are quite similar to what is experienced in real life.

All in all, The Penis Monologues was a great, entertaining way to spend an evening. Sometimes it’s fun to laugh about sex and all the various funny things that happen relating to our genitals. Penis.

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