Ever get a craving for frozen yogurt but are too lazy to head downtown to one the four frozen yogurt shops on College Avenue? No need to fret - soon you will be able to get your fro-yo fix on campus!
In a startling move, Penn State President Graham Spanier auctioned off the rights to the Alma Mater this morning. The highest bidder was renowned STD collector and 3rd grade spelling bee runner-up, Ke$ha. Ke$ha has rewritten the Alma Mater and named her creation “Eye <3 P$V.” It is currently available for purchase on iTunes.
"ARE YOU AWARE?" It's the question that has been asked to thousands of Penn State students this week via chalk messages and flyers across campus, yet we are unsure how to answer with anything other than "of what?".