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10 Gifts for Bill O’Brien’s Birthday

Today marks the 43rd birthday for Penn State’s first year head football coach Bill O’Brien.

It has certainly been a crazy year for the man who went from a little known assistant with the New England Patriots to Joe Paterno’s replacement tasked with navigating the Penn State Football program. O’Brien will spend the majority of his birthday just like most other fall Tuesdays. First, he will answer questions from reporters at the weekly press conference before preparing the Nittany Lions for their toughest test yet, a showdown against undefeated Ohio State on Saturday. In order to make things more fun, we came up with ten gift ideas that O’Brien could use on his birthday.

  • A placekicker — Yeah, yeah #FieldGoalsAreForQuitters is fun to tweet during games, but at some point a big kick may be needed to win a game late.
  • A Penn State hoodie with cut-off sleeves — If you learned from Bill Belichick, why not dress like him too, right?
  • Unlimited Dunkin’ Donuts — Being from the New England area, this would be perfect for the coach and may come in handy while watching tape late at night.
  • A toupee made of Shane McGregor’s hair — Perhaps O’Brien can use it to pull off a rock star look for Friday’s Rally in the Valley event.
  • A cake of his chin from Cake Boss — Who wouldn’t want this?
  • A chin guard — Protect that beautiful facial feature while running practices.
  • A cheesesteak from Billy O’s — Don’t worry. If you stop for one on a recruiting trip in Philadelphia, it will likely taste better.
  • Ownership stake in Billy O’s — Why not just go all the way? Look at what his offensive system did for Matt McGloin. This could become a world class place to eat.
  • A Twitter account — Just kidding coach. We know you hate social media and won’t do that to you on your birthday.
  • A victory against Ohio State — This would be the ultimate four-days-late present, and likely, the only thing O’Brien really wants.

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Posts from the all-student staff of Onward State.

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