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Onward Debate: Most Annoying Traffic In State College

Everyone knows how busy State College is. Even on non-game days, State College is buzzing with all sorts of people roaming the streets, biking to class, and driving to work. These people get to their destinations using many different modes of transportation, some more annoying than others. In this version of Onward Debates, three writers make their case for which mode of transportation is the most annoying to the day-to-day commuter at Penn State.

Drew Klingenberg — Drivers

There is no one worse to step foot (or dare I say pedal) on campus than those who drive through it. In my opinion, 50 percent of the world’s population does not deserve to even have their driver’s license. And 100 percent of those terrible drivers came to Penn State. Penn State drivers are honestly the worst kind of person on campus. Why? Like the old saying goes, “monkey see, monkey do.”

There is no doubt that drivers are the ruler of the road. I have no argument to that. Driving outside of State College, drivers have the right of way and there is no combating that. However, when on campus, Pennsylvania Law states that pedestrians have the right of way on a designated crosswalk. So when pedestrians are waiting to cross a crosswalk, they shouldn’t be waiting and drivers shouldn’t be blowing by them either. The speed limit on campus is 15 miles per hour, and drivers often hit 40. Drivers not only cause an unsafe environment for people walking to class, but they also don’t abide by the rules of the road. The worst kind of people are the ones who think the rules don’t apply to them.

Another reason why drivers are the worst kind of people is because of the example they set to bikers. Yeah, bikers are terrible, but it’s because they learn from the worst. When a driver doesn’t stop at a stop sign for more than the three second minimum, it makes everyone unclear of who’s turn it is. Then bikers don’t know what to do, and it turns into a confusing mess. No one likes an incompetent driver, especially on Penn State’s campus.

Jack Lukow — Pedestrians

Look, I get it, I really do. You’ve got nothing to lose, mounds of tuition, and a test you probably haven’t studied for. That car barreling down College Ave is probably more of a godsend than a hazard. But just because I understand doesn’t mean that you, pedestrians, aren’t the worst annoyance in State College.

I have never seen such disregard for personal health and life as I have seen with Penn State pedestrians. You have the right-of-way, but do you really want to push your luck? I have seen more instances of people walking out directly in front of my car than I can count, and if my reflexes had been that much slower it would’ve been quite the disaster. It is as if pedestrians don’t realize the thousands of pounds of hurtling metal that are headed straight towards them!

No, too busy with their headphones and their handholding, these people would rather live in a world of bliss and ignorance where cars are all-knowing and crosswalks define safety.

Pedestrians are the most annoying traffic in State College simply because of their lack of thought. Like a pack of lemmings walking faithfully to their doom, these masses operate as if safety is to be taken for granted. “Look both ways,” their common sense should say. “Pay mind to cars traveling at inhuman speeds down the highway,” they should think. But no, without thought, pedestrians walk into intersections and boldly go where no unshattered shin has ever gone before. Pay attention, Penn State pedestrians. Save us some stress and yourself a hefty time spent at the hospital.

Ben Rappaport — Bikers

Pedestrians hate drivers, drivers hate pedestrians, but pedestrians and drivers both hate bikers. Bikers are the worst for a clear and concise reason: they move slower than cars, but still can go on pedestrian paths. If cars could go on sidewalks and mow down people, then yeah, they would be the worst. If humans were made of metal and normally moved around 10-15 miles per hour, they would be the worst. But bikes are both just too fast and just too dangerous, making them the worst traffic in State College.

Drew makes a promising argument by saying the reason bikers suck is ultimately because of drivers. I have to disagree. Bikers have some innate sense that the rules of the road don’t apply to them. Even in my hometown, I see them ride the road ignoring stop signs and traffic lights. They don’t give a fuck about anything. They assume people who aren’t looking at them will get out of their way. Yet most normal Penn State students don’t have eyes on the back of their heads. Sorry to disappoint you, future Tour De France riders.

From a driver’s perspective, there is absolutely nothing worse than being caught behind a biker. They obnoxiously slow down traffic, and hinder every car they come near. The impatience that builds from being behind a biker causes drivers to act rash and pass them over-aggressively, which can lead to dangerous driving. There just aren’t enough bike lanes in State College to let bikers share the road. Of course, that means bikers just choose to ride on sidewalks instead. All in all, bicyclists think they can transcend the rules, making them the worst type of Penn State traffic.

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What type of transportation can you not stand on campus? 

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About the Author

Staff

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