One Last Farewell To The Big Onion
To our beloved Big Onion:
You are something Penn State students hold close to their hearts, and you form the basis of the unique East Halls dining experience. There is nothing more satisfying than a slice of your pizza after a long day. You’ve been there through every bad day, all the post-exam blues, and all the late night munchies. We just wanted to let you know how much you are loved.
From the beginning of your days, you provided freshmen, and the occasionally nostalgic upperclassmen, with endless chicken fingers, cheese fries, and greasy pizza that rivals even the most classic State College eateries. You were our friend through the rough hangovers and the 8 a.m. classes, supporting us with custom breakfast sandwiches and parfaits. Not once did you judge us for our appearance or level of intoxication while you showered us with comfort food and all-you-can-eat condiments.
Our meal points and LionCash reached new lows as our souls and stomachs soared sky-high. It is a true testament to the deep connection that the student body shares with you when upperclassmen revisit. The same smell of pizza crust and cheesesteaks brings us right back to the days of living in a 15- by 12-foot cinder block box, wearing shower shoes, and hiding from our RA.
More often than not, we try to deny their affections for your gourmet cuisine, but ultimately find ourselves begging and bribing for meal points so we can get our fix. Big Onion, you are an addiction, a lifestyle, a haven, and just too damn good to give up, baby.
Not only have you given us sanctuary from the horrors of the dining hall above, but you may or may not be responsible for the “freshman 15.” But what are love handles compared to the solace of a late-night slice? We can handle the weight only if you promise to stay.
One could say that you are a peak source of enjoyment for freshmen in East Halls, but the entire Penn State community is saddened by your approaching absence.
Even if the renovations to Findlay Commons will bring new life to East Halls, it is so hard to say goodbye to you, old friend. Here’s to you, Big O, and thank you for the memories you gave us. Thank you for all the joy, all the laughter, and of course, all the pizza. You will most definitely be missed.
Emily Davis, and the rest of Penn State
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About the Author
All in all, it’s important to remember that there’s really no such thing as bad dancer mail.
We were blown away by your Penn State weddings, complete with shakers, Lion Shrine cakes, and a few Blue Band performances.
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