Topics

More

Overheard During The Penn State Clown Hunt

Students poured into the streets early Tuesday morning at the first whisper of a Penn State Clown sighting. With so many Penn Staters crowding together over something so…ludicrous, the Clown Hunt provided the perfect opportunity to kick off this year’s first installment of Overheard.

We saw tennis rackets, baseball bats, and hockey sticks. You allegedly saw clowns. Here are the best things we overheard during Monday night’s hunt for the Penn State Clown:

Guy who’s only prejudiced against one category of fictional characters: “I don’t care about your race, color, or creed. Fuck the clown.”

Kid who apparently never watched “It”: “That clown is someone’s son.”

Girl who has her priorities straight: “Wait mom I’ll call you back. HEY ARE YOU GOING TO TAKE PICTURES OF THE CLOWN?!”

Kid who knows the slippery slope leading to clownhood all too well: “Hey are you the clown?!” as an Onward State editor rode past on his bike

Guy who can’t wait for the election to be over: “There’s clowns on campus? I didn’t know Hillary and Trump were coming.”

Blonde girl in distress apparently on the phone with her mother: “Mom I don’t even know right now okay!?”

Kid baffled by the sheer number of students walking across Pollock Road: “There’s no way all these kids live in East.”

Guy who supports Trump puns and just wants to stop the madness: “It’s time to make clowns funny again.”

Brave kid running down Pollock Road, prepared to take one for the team: “I’M GONNA FUCK THIS PUSSY UP!”

Girl who is both humbled and honored to be on #ClownWatch2016: “Well, now you know clowns will be in the line dance.”

Your ad blocker is on.

Please choose an option below.

Sign up for our e-mail newsletter:
OR
Support quality journalism:
Purchase a Subscription!

About the Author

Elissa Hill

Elissa was the managing editor of Onward State from 2017-2019. She is from Punxsutawney, PA [insert corny Bill Murray joke here] and considers herself an expert on all things ice cream. Follow her on Twitter (@ElissaKHill) for more corny jokes.

Staff Predictions: No. 4 Penn State vs. Purdue

Our staffers think this game will be a blowout in favor of the Nittany Lions, except for one for some reason.

Meterologist To Entrepreneur: How Todd Miner Brought ‘Transport-tainment’ To State College

Vamos! Lion Chariots was founded in 2012.

Five Penn State Wrestlers To Participate In NWCA All-Star Classic

The Classic will take place at 7 p.m. on Saturday, November 16, at Rec Hall.

113kFollowers
164kFollowers
62.3kFollowers
4,570Subscribers
Sign up for our Newsletter
Other posts by Elissa

2020 Blue-White Game To Kick Off April 18

More details will be announced following the 2019 season, but the game is usually scheduled for a mid-afternoon kickoff and aired live on BTN.

Penn State Football Announces First Five Kickoff Times For 2019 Season

Behring, Barlow, Engeman, & Marshall Secure Democratic Nominations For State College Borough Council