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The Best State College Drunk Food Bracket: Round 3

We started with 32 late-night favorites. You’ve helped us trim the field down to eight spots students love to stuff their faces at to cap off evenings at frats, bars, and apartment parties.

We saw some surprising upsets and a few wild blowouts during the Sweet 16, including the first top seed to go down. As we prepare to set the stage for the Final Four and to eventually crown one of the eight remaining favorites as the best drunk food in State College, remember to heed the words of Tammany Hall: “Vote Early. Vote Often.”

Bar Food

No. 1 Phyrst Fries (57.5% over Cafe Skillet Fries) vs. No. 3 Mad Mex Burritos (52.9% over Champs Nachos)

The Phyrst dish to make it to the Elite Eight is the winner of the highly anticipated Tater Throwdown. The College versus Beaver matchup pitted two classic bars’ classic french fry offerings against each other in a true West Side Story between what we might as well call the Jets and the Sharks.

Joining Phyrst Fries in the next matchup is Mad Mex Burritos, which narrowly got past Champs and into the regional final.

Pizza & Wings

No. 1 Wings Over (56.5% over DP Dough) vs. No. 3 Pokey Stix (51.3% over Canyon)

Wings Over had no issue getting by a formidable opponent in D.P. Dough and its plentiful selection of calzones. We imagine Wings Over’s decision to stay open later played a crucial role in expanding the deficit.

Students really are as close to split as they possibly could be on whether they prefer Canyon or Gumby’s. In the closest matchup of the round, Pokey Stix punched is ticket to the Elite Eight with a memorable win over Canyon that was decided by just 26 votes. Don’t ever let anyone tell you your vote doesn’t matter, folks.

Sandwiches & Tacos

No. 2 Are U Hungry (82.4% over Yallah Tacos) vs. No. 5 Bradley’s Cheesesteaks (78.9% over Sheetz)

“Do you believe in miracles?!” 
                                                                                         -Al Michaels, March 26, 2018

The shoe still fits for Cinderella Bradley’s Cheesesteaks. On the back of Sister Jean, Loyola Chicago   fifth-seeded Bradley’s danced past third-seeded Sheetz and into the Elite Eight. We suspect the folks from “right outside of Philly” had something to do with this one.

“DOWN GOES YALLAH! DOWN GOES. YALLAH! DOWN GOES YALLAH!”
                                                                                   -Howard Cosell, March 26, 2018

The opposite side of the bracket also brought a blowout upset, as Are U Hungry took down down top-seeded Yallah Taco in a blowout worse than Virginia’s 20-point loss to 16th-seeded UMBC and arguably just as unexpected.

Miscellaneous

No. 1 McDonald’s (77% over Crunchee Munchees) vs. No. 3 Insomnia Cookies (61.2% over Uncle Chen’s)

Top-seeded McDonald’s flexed its muscles and asserted truly how large the deficit is between a one- and a two-seed, easily taking out Crunchee Munchees.

McDonald’s will have a tall task at hand in order to reach the Final Four when it meets another prevalent chain and late-night favorite: Insomnia Cookies, which rolled over building mate Uncle Chen’s in an easy win that showed why they call it the ~Sweet~ 16.

When will the clock strike midnight for Bradley’s? Does college town staple Insomnia have a chance against “The Man” aka corporate machine McDonald’s? How will a showdown between arguably the two best choices for ordering food late at night end?

Keep voting this week to decide on the best drunk food in State College.

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About the Author

Anthony Colucci

Anthony Colucci was once Onward State’s managing editor and preferred walk-on honors student who majored in psychology and public relations. Despite being from the make-believe land of Central Jersey, he was never a Rutgers fan. If you ever want to know how good Saquon Barkley's ball security is, ask Anthony what happened when he tried to force a fumble at the Mifflin Streak. If you want to hear the story or are bored and want to share prequel memes, follow @_anthonycolucci on Twitter or email him at [email protected]. All other requests and complaints should be directed to Onward State media contact emeritus Steve Connelly.

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