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Jonathan Sutherland Will Volunteer As Tribute For Saquon Barkley If Drafted By Cleveland

Penn State safety Jonathan Sutherland announced on Sunday that he intends to volunteer as tribute in the event that the Cleveland Browns call Saquon Barkley’s name on draft day.

This move was made possible by the NFL’s new “Katniss Everdeen Rule” that allows a player from the same university to replace a star player drafted to a crappy team, conditional on a vote by NFL owners, similar to how the rule’s namesake famously volunteered herself in The Hunger Games.

The rule was designed to prevent top draft prospects from wasting their primes on perennially bad teams, which is ultimately in the best interest of the entire league — especially with ratings on the decline recently.

Owners were nearly unanimous on the decision in the case of Barkley to Cleveland. Out of 32 NFL teams, only one voted against the tribute. Surprisingly, that team was the New England Patriots, in an apparent effort to neutralize Barkley’s impact on the league and their own Super Bowl chances by letting the Browns draft him. The Browns, on the other hand, didn’t realize there was a difference between Barkley and Sutherland, so they ended up voting in favor of the replacement.

Former Cleveland Browns quarterback Johnny Manziel, in the midst of attempting his own NFL comeback, said, “Damn. I wish we had that rule when I was drafted.”

Now, if the Browns go through with drafting Barkley, they’ll receive Sutherland and exclusive negotiating rights with Barkley after his sixth season in the NFL. In the meantime, Barkley will be placed back on the draft board.

Sutherland views the situation as a win-win for both himself and Barkley, as he explained after practice this week before he officially made his decision.

“By replacing Saquon, I’ll get drafted higher than I ever will after a few more years of college football,” Sutherland pointed out, “and he gets to avoid Cleveland altogether.”

Barkley was touched by the gesture.

“It’s not often you meet someone willing to sacrifice so much for you,” said “He’s is committing professional suicide, so my career can flourish elsewhere. That’s a true friend.”

As for the Browns, they’re just excited about the prospect of having No. 26 from Penn State on their roster.

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About the Author

Anthony Fiset

Anthony is a senior *gasp* majoring in Economics and a lifetime Costco Executive Member. If you are an employer, please hire him. Otherwise, direct all complaints to [email protected].

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