What Song Was Penn State Football Dancing To?

When Penn State defeated Indiana this weekend, the team’s Twitter account posted a video from inside the locker room of the team celebrating. Except, the music was muted.

We weren’t sure if this was because the song was too explicit for social media. Or perhaps because it was too embarrassing of a song that players requested it not be shared. Or possibly because no one has felt brave enough to take over the aux now that Marcus Allen has graduated, so the team just dances in silence out of respect for Chico Hendrix.

We took the liberty of trying to guess what the song was.

The Classic Gaff Banger

This is a very likely possibility, because our reaction to most of Saturday’s game was “I just can’t look. It’s killing me.”

A Victory Song from a Pineapple Under the Sea

Surprisingly, 300-lb. football players dancing to the hottest banger from the SpongeBob Squarepants Movie just works.

The Hottest A-Ha Remix

There are few more fitting ways to celebrate barely avoiding an upset than with a flute that sounds about as shitty as your team looked.

A More Old-School Hip Hop Song

No. 69 is feeling this ~nice~ song selection.

Chip Skylark’s No. 1 Hit

My [white jerseys] that twinkle
Just like the stars in space

Just For the Night!

Anything to make it feel like you’re back in Beaver Stadium

If We Play Their Fight Song, It’ll Be Like We Won Too!

A win is a win. Winners can’t be Hoosiers.

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About the Author

Anthony Colucci

Anthony Colucci was once Onward State’s managing editor and preferred walk-on honors student who majored in psychology and public relations. Despite being from the make-believe land of Central Jersey, he was never a Rutgers fan. If you ever want to know how good Saquon Barkley's ball security is, ask Anthony what happened when he tried to force a fumble at the Mifflin Streak. If you want to hear the story or are bored and want to share prequel memes, follow @_anthonycolucci on Twitter or email him at [email protected]. All other requests and complaints should be directed to Onward State media contact emeritus Steve Connelly.

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