Topics

More

Hipster Howl: A Wistful Week

wistfulEw, Greek Week.  I cannot stand the sight of frat boys playing sports in public.

Look at them… hanging out with friends, laughing in the sunshine, getting plenty of exercise.  That’s so lame.  I am alone, smoking a cigarette, and suffering through my tight pants.  Obviously, I am better than them.

Last week sucked.  I went to a Campus Crusade for Christ meeting just to be ironic.  The Christians sicken me, but I enjoy witnessing their lunacy, albeit frightening.  I did some other ironic acts too.

The Earth Day celebration on Saturday wasn’t fun this year.  It’s so mainstream and commercialized now.  Green this, green that.  Littering is totally cool again.  As for the location… me, being seen on the HUB lawn?  I might as well wear a nauseous PSU hoodie and shout “We are!” at prospective students.

However, one ray of sunshine did illuminate my weekend.  The Co-op hosted a benefit concert for the children of Palestine (FTPK!).  I got to mingle with my fellow freethinkers and listen to some great independent music.  Plus they sold keffiyehs to raise funds for the Palestinian injustices.  Keffiyeh = mad alt cred.

Yesterday was 4.20, but I’m so over marijuana.  All the frat boys do it now, so what’s the point?  Heroin is totally where it’s at.  Yeah Chad, shoot up with Sebastian, you won’t.  Only really edgy people like me can handle smack.

[Image]

Your ad blocker is on.

Please choose an option below.

Sign up for our e-mail newsletter:
OR
Support quality journalism:
Purchase a Subscription!

About the Author

Sebastian

Sebastian is an unfortunate doppelgänger.

Penn State Wrestling Sets New NCAA Record With 78 Consecutive Dual Victories

There are kids in first grade who have not seen Penn State wrestling lose a dual.

Penn State Wrestling’s Aaron Nagao ‘Probably’ Needs Surgery After Suffering Injury In Early-Season Tournaments

Nagao was ranked as high as No. 7 in the country at 141 pounds this season.

No. 1 Penn State Wrestling Shuts Out No. 16 Rutgers 46-0

Braeden Davis burned his redshirt after filling in for the injured 141-pound starter Aaron Nagao.

113kFollowers
67.4kFollowers
4,570Subscribers
Sign up for our Newsletter
Other posts by Sebastian

Hipster Howl: My Call for Comrades

I finally started my underground poetry circle, but it’s so underground that nobody knows about it.  And telling people about my poetry circle is definitely selling out to the man. Matilda and I broke up, not that we were actually dating. Her impetus?  She found Miley Cyrus tracks on my iPod.  I told her I […]

Hipster Howl: My Passion for Fashion

Hipster Howl: Thoughts