For many people, Valentine’s Day brings up a lot of questions. What is love? Is there such a thing as destiny? What’s the best way to dance on a pole? This year, this reporter decided to tackle the toughest of these questions. To get the answers I needed, I knew that I would have to go to a definitive expert. A Gentleman of State College.

Who are the Gentlemen of State College, you may ask? They provide a service many people may be needing around this time of year:

We are Central Pennsylvania’s newest and hottest male escort service for men and women who want the best escort service in Central Pennsylvania. […] The Gentlemen of State College proudly presents the best, most outrageous, charming, sexy and sophisticated gentlemen in Central Pennsylvania.

I knew that this is where I would find answers, so I sat down for a straight-shooting interview with Russell Wilson, one of the Gentlemen’s finest. Read on for that interview.

How did you become a Gentleman of State College?

It started out as a classified ad. Then an interview took place in a bar, and then finally a photo shoot.

What do you prefer your job title to be?

It depends on what I’m doing. Sometimes I’m an escort and sometimes I’m a personal companion. And other times I’m a stripper.

What was the age of your oldest client?

That’s not really a specific thing I can answer because I don’t know. But I can say that someone told me they have grandkids older than me.

What’s the most ridiculous thing you have had to do?

I did take a call where the mother of a bride requested a “conservative stripper” for a  bridal shower where the ages ranged from 20’s to 60’s

If you were “escorting” someone on Valentine’s day, what present would you get?

If I was going to be escorting someone other than my girlfriend, the evening would probably include some strawberries in champagne with a side of chocolate roses

What is your idea of a perfect first date?

I prefer to stay away from the whole movie trend. I like to start off with an interesting way of getting together, such as going to her favorite place in town. Then we would go to the nontraditional dinner, like hibachis or a Mongolian grill. Finally, off to something exciting where the conversation can continue such as ice skating or bowling.

What do you look for in your valentine?

I’m a personality guy all the way. I like a girl that can keep the conversation going without taking too much control of it. If you can make me smile and laugh, then you can be my valentine.

Do you believe in love at first sight?

Sometimes I have to walk by twice.

Do you have a valentine this year?

I do. I think.

What does she think of your occupation?

She’s very supportive and gives me lots of ideas. I get my romantic side from her.